done and done...

okay,
we're homeowners, for real.
all the way now, and have assumed ownership,
and starting tomorrow we begin inhabiting our epic Folk Life Fortress.
narrow victories are still victories.
y'know what they call the dude who barely squeaks ahead
crossing the finish line a millisecond before his competitors?
...the winner.
it's so true, too.
to the victors go the spoils,
and the soul-crushing mortgage payments.
as my homeslice mitch wrote by way of congratulations:
"welcome to your new master, the bank of monthly ass-rape."
ouch.
must be a sperm bank, i guess...
of course,
i'm not sure it's actually ass-rape, per se,
since i signed up for it;
on about two hundred thousand pieces of paper....

i guess there was some behind the scenes drama, too!!
scandalous.
while we were home stressin' about the situation,
all kinds of 'are-you-kidding-me' action was unfolding.
i mean, real deal human conflict,
with hard-style law enforcement involvement an' all.
lawyers were callin' realtors,
police were ruining everybody's good time,
and ex-husbands and wives were hatin' on each other.
i was mostly waitin' around on the last day of vacation....
fortunately for jess and i,
we arrived this morning at OUR house,
and it was 2 legit to mutha-lickin' quit.
that's right.
OUR house.
sooooooo,
tomorrow, we're officially done with our vacation,
and woodsly goodness residents in perpetuity.
that means that all the old and busted doo-doo buttery disasters,
inside the house and out,
need to be addressed.
where my handy-mans at?
i need painters, scrapers, scrubbers,
scoopers, plumbers, carpenters,
and assorted good-vibe infusers.

and,
we'll have no phone or internet for a week.....
real life is looming.
daruma has his other eye filled in.
we've got a bucket of cleaning products
and i expect to use 'em up in the first two days.
dirt dirty, dirtiness.
i'm a mess with home improvement;
never quiet, never soft....