TIME TRAVEL.

dudes,

shoutouts to fast forwarding.

yup.

i could use four exxxtra hours every day,

and instead,

i lost one.

word up.

let's hear it for time travel!

woooooooo.

ugh.

the clock reads an hour into the future,

and i'm over here in the darker than yesterday,

making stuff to see me through this unseasonably awful stretch

of abysmally abominable bad weather.

yup.

nature wins,

father time finishes a close second.

a bunch of hard life and tough times comes in for the bronze

and who's dead last?

probably all the lazy fatties out there,

but i'm not on the podium either,

as space and time collide in this buffeting blast of arctic wind 

that's lasted for a week, give or take about a missing hour.

yuck.

YUCK.

yuuuuuuck.

i don't like it, at all, y'all,

and it's affecting my pace.

yup.

a frozen, windburnt face is no bueno.

a sapped and drained body, shivering by the fire, is even worse-

and a cold, old, sore, sour, busted and surly warrior poet is the worst!

guys,

that's ALL really happening, 

as this forced march into the midmonth,

with the lowest temperatures, 

and the highest snowfalls,

and all the other woodsly goodsly woes of the north 

progresses far faster than i can keep pace with.

awwwwwwwww.

.......at least there's always treats to console me.

and not juts any treats will do.

nope.

i'm on some real real white people sh!t.

uh-huh.

check the teleport:

FIG MULBERRY CRUMB BARS!!!

that's some crackery-A* business, for sure.

-

they're really buttery, and that's a nice touch,

because there are LOTS of dried figs,

and dried white mulberries in 'em, too.

guys!

they're so soft and so chewy,

and that fruit action is pure hottness.

you want some?

ok.

i have a few left.

you wanna make some?

ok.

here's how the magic was conjured:

-

*

-

1 cup brown sugar;

1 stick 8T vegan butts;

4 T fig preserves;

1 tsp vanilla;

1/2 tsp salt.

mashed and blended and ready to rock,

plus:

1/2 cup non-dairy yogurt, well-whisked-

then, the dry bits get activated in force:

1 cup chopped dried figs;

2 cups flour;

1/2 cup whole sun-dried mulberries;

2 tsp baking powpow;

1 tsp baking soda;

1 cup non-dairy milk;

and a dash of nutmeg.

stirred, and whipped, and mixed all nicey-nice.

dudes,

dried fruit can be pretty good, so long as it's the right one.

mmm.

i baked it up in a brownie pan, 

at 350F,

for 33 minutes,

and let it cool off.

the frosting is pretty simple stuff, too.

1.5 cups of powdered sugar;

3 T butts;

1.5 T creamchee';

splash of vanilla;

a dash of nutmeg;

and enough soymilk, tsps at a time,

to make it whip up smooth as heck,

and all sorts of rich and lovely.

-

neighbors,

who knew upper-tier luxury flavors could be so simple and accessible??

word up.

shoutouts to the good life, bro.

***********

when the wind doesn't ever stop,

and the temperature stays subzero,

AND there's a missing hour?

yup.

that's when the walks are the longest.

and that's what's on the menu in a minute.

bummer.

uphill and downwind,

for the least enjoyable length of outdoorsiness i've had in almost 24 hours.

it's only been a solid 23, because, you know, time travel;

never quiet, never soft.....