WET LEAVES!!!

making art.

taking walks.

going for rides.

exercising.

writing,

reading.

baking.

lately,

it's ALL really happening,

and more of all it than usual, as a matter of fact.

so,

where the heck did all that expert time management come from??

...salads.

that's right.

it comes from salads.

yup.

ha.

what?

yeah, 

yeah,

i eat salad mutha-F*ers.

word to wet leaves, they're delicious.

dudes,

making a salad takes, at most, about five minutes.

and it's got nutrients and sh!t.

and it's crawnchy.

and it's helpful.

how?

well, i've maybe been eating a little MORE than my fair share,

and as i spent two weeks being weak in the exercise department,

i've noticed a few changes that aren't super-sexxxy around the ol' wasitline.

hence,

salads.

minimal oil,

maxxximum green stuff,

a few sweetened seeds, sprouts, whatever's around.

salad, man.

that's not normally my thing.

but,

i guess i'm making it my thing.

check the teleport:

SALAD.

SALAD.

SALAD.

yeah!!

do you know how to make salad?

if the answer is no, you are the worst.

hahahah.

c'mon.

dudes!

i'm reppin' some healthful replacement meals.

i mean,

overdoing it is awesome,

unless you end up all fat and blarpity.

that's when you've got to overindulge in better stuff.

overdosing on lettuce?

yeah, good luck with that.

good food does good things,

but big batches of big treats every day do other other things, too.

it's all fun until someone ends up lookin' lazy and sloppy.

-

hey, kids,

there's no shame in eating a gigantic salad sometimes.

i mean,

i don't want a small meal,

i just don't want a huge life-preserver of human flash around my navel.

yuck.

now,

if you're big, and you like being big, then be big.

that's your business.

over here tho, where i'm at?

i look weird being skinny-fat, and i all-too-vovodly remember when i was.

never again.

nope.

i can't go backwards.

it felt bad, and it looked worse,

and i'm not about that life at ALL.

look, 

i can appreciate the thickness.

heck, 

i may just run up on some exxxtra-large cheeks for weeks.

i'm no size-ist,

and while i'm definitely guilty of body-shaming the sloppiest jalopies on the lot,

that's way more about effort than circumference.

real talk.

i've got big love for big girls,

and i've got high-fives for barrel-bodied bros-

but i just can't hang out with sh!t-heap messes.

on the ones,

presentation counts.

see those salads?

presentation.

it counts.

awwwww.

sorry, everybody.

but i never said i wasn't shallow.

*

i'm bringing my ensalada gigante game up strong.

and i'm taking the mix-in's and add-ons to eleven.

i want the big deluxxxe.

i want all the lettuce.

i want MORE of all of it.

and the best part?

you can eat a LOT of salad before you're full.

too much is the right amount, neighbors;

never quiet, never soft.....