MAYDAY MAYDAY!!

MAY DAY!
today
big fun?
maybe.
but,
more than likely, however,
there will be rain on the parades.
none of which will occur in the woodsly goodness,
where the struggle for righteous working class equity is still real,
albeit largely ignored by the woodboogery redneck proletariat.
real talk.
these necktards do NOT give a single sh!t about the wider world.
and although MAY DAY could be a druid fluid pyre exxxplosion,
they'd have to learn something in order to even know about it,
and that's SO unlikely, i'd say there's a solid 0% chance of it.
i was thinking about running in circles around a pole,
in original MAY DAY style.
yup.
because the may pole is probably what's up.
...if you're a druid, or a hippie, or from, like, 1920.
but,
instead,
i'll be at work today, zappin' all up on these dudes,
trying to scoop up a few movie checks for later.
guys,
i'm just sayin'-
i don't like most parades,
and besides, i'm a bit of a ways away from minneapolis,
where the really good one goes on-
also,
i'm not about to bandana my face and protest anything, either.
nope.
i'm protesting poverty in my own way, i guess, by tattooing all damned day.
i'll also be eating muffins.
uh-huh.
there's more to the first of any month than just saying the magic words,
or getting all walpurgisnacht on these fools.
that's real.
rules is rules,
and you've GOT to have a treat on the first.
that's just how it IS, man.
more about that when thy're out of the oven.
but,
let me tell you about the traditional meeting of sorcerors on walpurgis eve.
ha!
don't know about that
are you gonna look it up?
no?
bummer, you just passed the necktard test.
congrats. you are one.
womp womp.
ANYway, for those of us who love learning things, and know what's up-
i had a sorcerors' circle last night,
as tradition dictates,
with a few of my favorite wizardly familiars-
pizza dough and the alchemical awesomeness of my superhot oven,
complete with philosopher's baking stone.
mmmhmmmmm.
check the teleport:

PEE EYE ZEE ZEE AYY!!!
yeah!!
my god,
i just do so LOVE a good pizza pie for my face.
490°F.
that's how hot it gets.
and the smoky seitan?
that's some serious flavor-
GPOP and olive oil to start the sizzle,
with smoked paprika, sweet paprika, and liquid smoke to activate the flavor.
plus seitan broth and a splash of soy, too.
y'know, to turn up the glazed caramelization to eleven.
i never get tired of pizza.
i can't.
it's too damned good.
broth-braised broccoli and seared asparagus?
....delicious.
caramelized onion, daiya mozzarella chee', and fried garlic sprankles?
that's the rules, bro.
you can't eff with these decrees.
they exist to optimize the pizza scene to it's fullest potential.
radicchio ribbons post-bake?
c'mon.
a tiny zipzap of bitter, to complete the flavor profile.
that's how you doo-doo the pizza situation at the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress.
it's no maypole,
but it sure ain't no weak sauce, either.
*
today is the day.
the first one,
the big one.
MAY DAY.
or MAYDAY MAYDAY, as the distress call goes.
it seems the cries for help have quieted here at home,
and the rest of it has sort of just gotten heavier,
as if this rain just soaked through everything.
i'm supersaturated with real life, i guess you could say.
and it weighs a ton.
it's may.
and i just may.
it's time to march, in protest of well-behaved dogs.
yup.
crabtree and i are headed north,
until we're drenched or tired or both.
its all really happening.
i say that a lot;
never quiet, never soft.....