Wednesday, September 13

UPSIDES!!

apples on the bottom are actually apples on top!
yup.
apples are for september,
and september is where everything changes.
change, apparently, is good for you?
i hear that, but i'm not sure i all-the-way-believe it.
not yet, anyway.
ANYway dudes,
early apples really are SO nice.
i mean,
summer apples are good, sure-
but,
september apples are the ONES,
but, like, on the ones.
they're that jet li sh!t, y'heard?
c'mon.
i get 'em, and i get into it as soon as they're gotten.
this time, i made a cake.
upside down,
so the apples went in first,
and came out last,
but with all the right stuff above/below-
y'wanna see it?
ok.
check the teleport:

feel those APPLE VIBES!!
cinnamaple frosting is key here.
it always is, really.
the cake itself was a dense bomber,
but i attribute that to a pair of variables-
steam from those wet-A* apples,
and maple syrup compacting the whole thing
into that flour-based cheesecakey consistency.
eh. it smelled incredible. it tasted terrific.
the texture left a little to be desired, but i'll bet that the following recipe repairs that readily.
here's how to do it better than i did:
-
*
UPSIDERAPPLEDOWNS!!
-
preheat your oven to 360℉.
-
peel core and slice two large early spetember apples of your choice-
fan them out in the bottom of a greased 9" springform pan,
and dust liberally with brown sugar.
-
in your trusty mus-have stand-up mixerizer, combine:
1 stick (8T) vegan butter;
1/2 cup raw sugar;
1/4 cup light brown sugar;
1/4 cup real maple syrup-the darkness. like, grade b if you have access to it;
1 tsp vanilla;
cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger;
1/2 tsp maple extract;
1/2 cup applesauce.
whisk that all together, well past the point of individually recognizable elements-
now add:
2 cups flour;
2 tsp bakey powpow;
1 tsp bakey soda;
1 T organic non-GMO cornstarch, sifted;
1 cup non-dairy milk-
or better, 1/2 'milk, 1/2 apple cider (it's still a bit early for that, though)
- spread that across those apples,
and bake that bad baby for 30 minutes.
when you flip it over, be sure it's cool first.
then, y'might wanna use a long spatula to aid in the release of those luscious apples.
no pressure though.
-
guys,
cakes are dope.
THIS one was almost totally dope.
i mean, i'll F* with a thick one, but this was on the cusp of being not-great.
the recipe above, as i mentioned, corrects any of that bullsh!t,
so i think you'll find that it's expert now.
try it out.
or not.
i'm not the boss of you, anyway.
.......but i am the boss now, and that's not a bruce springsteen reference.
***********
today is the first walk-up wednesday at the new spot.
i know, i know-
wednesday IS a weird one to make the walk-ins happen on,
but,
it's not like we've got flash on the walls,
and it's not like i'm trying to do those doo-doo buttery jauns on the weekends.
so,
wednesday, on the hump-up, and for realsies,
is for tired ideas and weak sauce to weigh down heavy on the shoulders of your boys.
yeah.
we'll do whatever you'd like,
but that sh!t ain't free.
arbitrary designation of dope and doo-doo is what we do, dudes.
roll the dice, and bring us that pinterest picture, and we'll hook it up.
no job too lame, or small, or large-
first come, first served, all day, at AMPERSAND TATTOO.
ok.
in the interest of full disclosure-
i just need a day to work on other stuff,
and an unannounced walk-up day may give me the time i need to do some of that.
it's all happening, or is it?
i can't tell the difference right now;
never quiet, never soft.....

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