first night food fight club.

mmmmmmm.
neighbors,
2014 was such a dirty one;
like molto sucio....
and it was dumb, too;
like spectator sports.
but,
for really-realsies?
it tasted so flippin' good, though.
yeah.
on the way out,
we activated some elite treats for our faces.
i'm serious.
check the first-night-fight-club-type teleport:

stuffed.
that's what we had, that's what we were,
and that's no joke.
so, just what are we lookin' at up there?
counterclockwise, from the garlic'd collard greens,
we've got ourselves a rosemary-black pepper potato, garlic, and leek loaf,
with a little bit of daiya chee' and a whole lotta nootch.
next up,
original recipe epic expert legendary broccoli bread.
yep.
all the gooey  nootchity, g.p.o.p.pin'green floret freshness you've come to expect
from the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress, in F*ing full effect.
next to that is a custom dippin' sauce,
elevated to eleven with fresh garlic and sweet onions, herbs, spices,
and two kinds of tomatoes.
yeah!!
after that,
there's a rolled-up bread bomb with all the flavor,
and twice the hottness.
mmhmm-
brussels sprouts, baconesque bits, and caramelized onions!
so good.
like,
almost pretend, it's that unbelievable.
and last up, but certainly not least among the contestants,
escarole, white bean, and scallion bread.
c'mon.
i mean, C'MON.
friends,
you ARE aware that first night is a thing, right?
i'm just sayin',
unless you've never been to a city near new year's,
you must know what i'm talking about.
also,
if you actually truly haven't ever heard of it,
i am NOT talking about that camelot movie.
no way.
but,
when you've got so many loaves competing for maximum accolades,
in dough SO dope you can't distinguish the extra yeast,
from the turbo-charged gluten,
from the semolina,
from the salt,
from the olive oil......
well,
rules is rules,
and we all know one thing for sure about food fights,
and fight clubs, don't we?
yep.
if it's first night, you HAVE to fight.
that's real.
ha.
who won?
our big fat bellies, that's who won.
shark-gluttonous bite and swallow pig-wallowing in crust and crumb
and drips, drops, blops, blarps, and burps.
we doo-doo what we do, because we love food.
word up.
***********
was there dessert?
obviously.
i mean, really, now, do you even have to ask??
don't be dumb all over again first thing in a new year, guys.
jeez.
the thing of it is-
raspberries are good.
tarts are good.
chee'cake is crazy amazing good.
but all of that, together, is even better than good.
it's expert.
and that's what we need.
check the final-treat-of-'14-type teleport:

ka-booooooooom
artistry is the name of the game.
raspberry jam, in creamchee' custard,
with powdered freeze-dried berry dust busting a move all up in it, like a pro...
sittin' in a graham crackery cookie-crumb crusty cup,
with juuusssst enough oats and brown sugar to keep it a little livelier than usual;
all of that, haloed in luscious lemony snippets of frosting;
and all of THAT glazed with a raspberry reduction icing.
there's no way we were going out like little weak-sauce punk-A* b!tchburgers.
not once, not never, and not while i have anything to say about it.
first night food fight club.
that's our new thing.
it's now been decreed.
and that's the way it's gonna be;
never quiet, never soft.....