XI

XI-MAS.
better than just your ordinary X-mas,
and that by an order of magnitude.
it goes to eleven because it has to.
expectations run high as to our Folk Life country holiday.
yeah.
you know how it is,
but don't fret, friends-
we did it right.

c'mon.
picture perfect woodsly fireplace magic.
that's some elite crackery jauns, for sure.
stuffed stockings,
crisp edged metallic-foils on the boxes,
color-coordinated bows an' tissue an' that,
with scent-locked memory-bank activation inside and out.
hmm?
the candles are the key, kids.
it smells exactly the same on the inside of the boxes
as it does inside the Fortress.
smart.
even the chocolates matched the stockings.
i know.
expert.
white chocolate polar bear in the polar bear sock,
and a dark chocolate penguin in the penguin.
fortune smiles sometimes, neighbors.
anyway, it was perfect.
check the showboat-and-grandstanding-type teleport:

harvest's haul.

and maple's.
c'mon.
i may be a savage.
i may be an ugly duckling.
i may be a werewolfen barbarian.
i may be an abominable blizzard wizard.
i may even just be a real rat-bastard sunovab!tch-
but,
when it comes to the times i span by choice?
i put every ounce of intention and attention and detailed focus
into making sure that i make up for all the rest of it.
these kids are important to me,
and i present my presents as a reflection of that.
it's just stuff.
i know that.
but it's also exactly what they wanted,
and it's exactly the kind of thing that lets 'em know i'm listening.
it's not only about what's in the box, dummies-
it's the whole thing.
the big picture.
the grand gesture.
the fancy holiday family togetherness good feelings.
i'm sayin'-
we make magic,
and we create memories with the time we've got.
every minute counts more when we're together.
that's the whole point.
the piles were heaped with excellence,
the sights and sounds and smells were intense,
the fire was roaring,
the lights were shining,
and all of it was just what we wanted,
and exactly what we needed.
what's better than a second christmas?
XI-mas, every time.
more beautifully, more super-fancily,
more expert.
the name says what it is-
eleven-mas;
never quiet, never soft.....
.....mas means more, duh.

party pizzas.

what's for lunch in the woodsly goodness?
well,
let's worry about breakfast first, friends.
waking up on XI-mas was expert.
waking up to hot, gooey, chewy, sticky cinnamon buns
was probably even better.
i wouldn't know.
i was too busy making 'em.
awwwwwww.
check the breakfast-time-family-togetherness-type teleport:

mmmmmmmm.
yeah, i know.
you wish i was your dad, huh?
i had all the candles lit,
and that just added to the wafting warm aroma of perfection
that permeated the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress.
and yeah,
i totes hit 'em off with the site-specific seasonal spranks.
you need a sweet and sugary breakfast if you're gonna get rad
on a big ol' pile of XI-mas presents an' that.
true story.
so, we did that.
and after all the unwrapping and oooh-ing and ahhh-ing,
and all the gratitude and generosity had done what it had to,
we kept the dough going,
and kneaded up another 'nother batch of floury hottness.
check the pizza party-time-type teleport:

mmmhmmm.
neighbors,
i've got my pizza jauns going hard these days.
beige bits of chickenish, fresh green bits of brocc'd florets,
and two kinds of chee'.
harvest and maple powered it all right down
before i could even think of getting a slice.
shark-gluttonous barbarian appetite may be hereditary.
nature winds,
and in this case, nurture doesn't help much, either.
there was more of it, though.
obvi.
teleport:

soysage, custom chee' blops, and double mushrooms?
that's that fancy business, b!tches.
we doo-doo that double-down topping-terrorism-type sh!t.
why wouldn't we, anyway?
right.
we aren't A*-holes after all.
and it's garnished with parsley and frenchy onion-style bits!
that's because we know what's up.
huh?
you want more?
greedy.
but, yeah, okay, anyways:

asparagus and leeks!
so good.
i'm tellin you guys,
my vegan cashew-and-tofu nootch-blasted chee' blops
may be blarpity, but the also take my non-dairy pizza reality up a notch.
eleven plus.
that's it.
what about all the remaining ingredients?
what about the baby kale and the spinach i had?
what about even more of all of this?
yuuuuuuuuup.
we did what we do, neighbors.
garbage-disposal-type teleport:

the big dump.
whatever's left, on one disc of dope deliciousness.
expert.
sure,
i went heavy on the store-bought chee'-
but we gotta use up what we've got before we go get more,
y'know?
*
we had a great day,
with great food,
and great times,
and greatness oozing out of every surface.
i am grateful for the peoples i've got.
these girls of mine give me a good reason to do more.
and more.
and more.
i'm teaching the next tyrannical troupe of raging stormswept valkyries.
the next generation of gypsy battle-beasts.
the future of warrior poetry,
and the new hottness in woodsly goodfellowship.
it seems like we just make food and hang out,
but every little bit of extra effort is an example i'm setting.
this is what we do.
expert recognize expert.
each one teach one;
and before you know it?
uh-huh.
we're all inextricably interconnected,
and taking it further, going farther,
getting busier, and being better.
no.
it's not easy,
and that's how i know i'm doing it right.
this is what's up,
and i'm grateful for the time i've been given;
never quiet, never soft.....

pizza parties.

if i'm gonna be in connecticut,
and my ace numero uno homeboy
is also gonna be in connecticut,
well,
then there's just no way we aren't gonna get together.
i gave my bestest friend his present while we spanned time
down in the ruts and ruins of our childhood.
yeah!
me and the cucch go way back,
to the bottom of the barrel,
and to the early days of being broke, broken, ugly,
and somehow still so dope.
he was around when all of this all started,
and he's still around.
a friend like that you make sure to stay connected to.
no jokes.
if you haven't been through it,
you probably can't really understand it.
rules is rules.
check the what-the-F*-type teleport:

word.
i guess some duders just can't be content wearing just one hat.
that pipe isn't actually that big,
but perspective goes a long way sometimes.
so we rode around being expert,
and getting gifts for people.
we do what we have to do, neighbors,
right up until the deadline.
and if we're last-ditch half-A* low-effort XI-mas shopping?
that's right.
we definitely need fuel for our bodies.
i mean,
how else are we gonna ward of connecticitits?
that's a thing.
the environment in the nutmeg state is toxic to warrior poets.
that's why all the really real ones all moved away.
anyway,
world-renowned super-famous nationally-ranked-and-accredited,
high-rated turbo-elite neighborhood pizzeria,
frank pepe's,
was what we got to hold us over.
two pizza-pies for two pizza-pie guys.
check the we-got-there-before-the-crowd-type teleport:

c'mon.
so simple,
but so flippin' rad.
we get busy with our throwback business.
a meal, a minute,
a few laughs, a hug, and that's that.
see you next year, my ninja.
life is pain,
but it hurts in a good way once in a while
like when you laugh until you cry a little.
yeah.
***********
overlaps of circles and cycles and routines and roads.
it's all interconnected,
rings of fire, smoke, memory, spirit, and electricity-
everything touches,
and intertwines,
and becomes a spiral of layers and layers and layers
of all of it as it all really happens.
ripples from the center,
and echoes from the edges.
people come and go and return and leave again,
and so do places.
i'm glad i came up where i did,
and i'm glad i'm at where i am now.
what i look forward to most, though, friends,
is where i'm headed.
it never ever stops moving,
all of it,
unfolding outward and picking up speed.
the plans might be secret,
but every interactive participatory piece reveals a little bit more.
and the object, if nothing else,
is always more.
where i'm from and where i'm at combining
to make something better than both?
time takes time.
that's a thing;
never quiet, never soft.....

nailed to the X-mas.

flee!
huh?
yeah.
as we sat in the restaurant,
on christmas night,
watching an actual horde of hungry humans
get their orders taken and their food served,
whilst we munched up on fried wonton wrappers,
and waited,
and waited,
and waited,
and waited.......
well,
the thought going through my brain the entire time?
FLEE!
there was no fight to be won in that place,
only the crush of a million non-celebratory-types
sitting pretty and eating easily whilst we got some
of our food, intermittently.
don't worry, duders-
it all arrived cold.
expert?
hardly.
so,
in the face of impending winter weather,
and an empty belly,
and high anxiety,
i bid a fond farewell to connecticut,
and broke north like a compass in the nighttime.
yeah.
we absconded with our intentions and aspirations,
late late late in the dark dark dark,
and we re-entered the woodsly goodness under the cover
of starlight peeking through stormclouds.
the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress was waiting for us,
and we enveloped ourselves in it's embrace.
family is good when it's good,
but really,
there's no place quite like home.
*
new haven is really beautiful.
no foolin'.
it's a good-lookin' city.
and so are all the ladies who live down there:

yeah.
so many girls.
and we're all sharing the same space,
at the same time,
going through the same sh!t.
it's all really happening.
that's the whole point.
*********** 
my family did good this time, y'all.
in many ways,
this holiday went pretty smoothly.
no brouhahas amongst the blood relatives.
that's a new one.
i think the fools at the chinese spots inadvertently
unified us all in our common cause of causing a commotion
and getting especially werewolfen on their weak sauce.
uh-huh.
somebody is gonna catch wreck on Xmas.
rules is rules.
i had a time.
i saw my peoples,
and we did our things.
i'm grateful for the times i have been given, y'all;
never quiet, never soft.....

shopping spree.

duders,
today was a rainy, congested, clammy,
clogged-up sh!t-hot mess of pure uncut connecticut.
uh-huh.
it seems even the elements make sure to conspire
and plot out all kinds of crappiness while i'm here.
whatever, though-
i brought the thunder AND the lightning-striking viking jauns
right along with eleven kinds of secret sunshine.
that's real.
huh?
well,
i just happen to have had maple and harvest
with me all dang day long,
and we made our own magic wherever we went.
...and we went everywhere.
that included mamoun's.
what do you guys know about the the original longstanding
365-days-a-year real deal falafel business?
what?
you don't know nothin'?
well,
you'd better ask somebody to set you on the right path.
introductory activation is mandatory when in new haven.
no jokes, no excuses.
i did my duty to history and old-time's sake an' that.
teleport:

more than a few of them found their way into our faces.
i mean,
we know what's good,
and we want all we can get until we're stuffed to the brim
with ultimate expertism, and tahini.
wee know how to beat bad weather and worse vibes
when we're surrounded by weak sauce and worse.
the shoppers trying to last-minute their messy situations
made it harder to get around town than it needed to be,
but we were powered by chickpeas,
and did all we had to and more.
(and the object is ALWAYS more)
more and more and more.
more what?
more of all of it.
and that included my personal favorite part.
check the celebratory-type teleport:

sprankles in XI-mas colors?
expert.
i'm telling you guys-
when i've gotta drive through the crackery causeways
of cheshire, connecticut-
you'd better believe there's gonna have to be a few
fresh-to-death scoops of emergency tofutti, too.
without the treats,
it's just a long drive to nowhere and back again.
real talk.
coffee crunch and cookies 'n' cream together?
the best one, neighbors.
that's exactly what that is.
***********
i'm here.
i'm spanning time.
i'm doing the best i can.
and sure,
i'm missing out on the woodsly goodness;
and sure,
i'm missing those ones i'm without...
but,
i've also got a whole family's worth of togetherness
to try to survive down here.
i've got what i got,
and i'll get what i deserve.
it's all really happening;
never quiet, never soft.....

berfday.

this is it.
a dozen years.
no jokes.
maple star turns twelve.
years old.
in a row.
today.
did i activate a cake?
even though i was racing around like a last-minute maniac?
even though i was cleaning, and cooking, and packing?
even though i was wrapping and sealing and watering?
c'mon.
of course i did.
i'm a worthy woodsly goodsly warrior poet,
and we do what we have to when we have to.
especially when it's for my sweet littlest daughter.
jeez.
you do know i'm not actually an A*-hole in really real life.
teleport:

yeah.
silver winter snow magic sprankles
on an even butterier betterthanevercreme-frosted
super-moist vegan white-chocolate infused yellow cake.
that's right.
i get busy,
and i get even busier when it comes to providing the goodness
for the great girls i've got in my life.
i took it to eleven for her twelfth.
and that's because i think she's so expert!
that's just what is done, and how.
and i doo-doo what needs doing.
also,
i wouldn't get to eat my cake if i didn't make it, too.
vegan treats creation is not among the abilities and interests
of the people i'm having party time with today.
but it's cool.
i come bearing gifts.
....and cake.
let them eat it.
and i'll take a neck-wreck check at the guillotine for a few days.
today is the day.
we're older and wiser,
and the roads are worse than ever.
there's ice pouring down from the clouds,
daring me to dart down south for the party.
am i worried?
am i frightened?
no way.
nature isn't done with me yet;
there's no way i'm not destined to endure another XI-mas
with the wild things and werewolves that raised me.
i'm going back to where it began,
to celebrate with my peoples,
and power down slice after slice after slice of cake.
it's all really happening.
...and i'm so grateful for the beautiful brilliant bouncing
boisterous baby girl who was born today.
happy berfday maple;
never quiet, never soft.....

seventh day rest.

the last day.
number seven.
the final night.
over and out and finished up.
that's all there is, neighbors-
pizza week is done.
it's cool, though.
i'm not sad.
it had a good run,
and i made the most of all those doughy circles.
i was hurried and harried and rushed and pushed,
and saturday night was not feeling very lively.
the icy rains and dark skies thwarted outdoor fire-times,
and so the solstice entered the annals as a silent segue into winter.
awwwwwwww.
what's even worse?
yeah.
totally phoned it in for the finale.
check the dang-that's-kinda-sad-type teleport:

what?!
personal-sized pizzas on english muffs?
no way......
c'mon.
what am i?
a lonely bachelor all by himself on a druidic holiday?
jeeez.
ouch.
i rep a long and benighted post-sunset subscript.
huh?
oh, stop-
it wasn't all THAT bad, kids.
go easy.
and those are salsa,black bean, chee' and jalapeno jauns.
was i getting winterized on some spicy multi-cultural sh!t?
yeah.
i doo-doo that ethnic cross-continental activation stuff.
on a flat nooked-and-crannied multigrain jammer to boot.
i know.
multi-F*ing-grain usually sucks all the balls, too.
punishing myself with just four mini pizzas seemed a little weak.
and eight bites later, when i was all finished?
oh, yes.
i fired up the oven and made myself a real one.

wordimus prime.
a much bettter lookin' and tastin' solstice pizza!
expert is as expert does, y'know?
i guess i refused to become complacent,
even when pressed for time, and energy, and space.
F* that.
active participation means doing stuff right,
all the time,
even when there isn't enough of any of it.
winter is no longer just coming, kids.
it's officially here.
pizza week ended,
and the grayest and the coldest and the darkest day did too.
it's all always really happening,
and we all always get a choice about how we're gonna interact inside it.
i opted for more.
that's the best way to be, i believe;
never quiet, never soft.....

six six six.

duders.
it seems i'm only a little bit less 'sgusting
when i'm all by my lonely.
uh huh.
that's for serious.
i ate five pizzas with a friend....
but what do i go and do when i'm hungry,
it's late, it's cold, it's dark,
and it's pizza week?
c'mon.
i do what needs to be done-
and i fire up three pies in a row, solo.
six days of pizza all the dang time,
and what happened?
three more types of dinnertime activation got poppin'.
i just don't get tired of pizza, friends.
........ever.
and when i'm reppin' those custom jauns?
bread and stuff and stuff and stuffs?
yeah.
i could do this allllllll day.
real talk.
neighbors,
check the teleport:

yeah!
crushed tomatoes,
thinned-out not-ricotta blops of chee' hottness,
pineapple,
and jalapenos.
i'm tellin' y'all right now-
it had all the right flavors all together in one place
having a filthy bad-touch time,
but in such a good way.
mmmmmmmm.
i doo-doo that sweet and spicy, salty, squishy, crunchy-type sh!t.
expert.
...
more?
yeah.
there's more:

asparagus and watercress,
with daiya(rrhea) chee' and tomato sauce,
and finished off with sprouts for added nutrient acivation?
F*ing-A right, folks.
green things are good for you.
pizza is good for you.
green things on pizza is doubly good for you.
word up.
-
and last,
but not least, by any means,
is the white french pizza deluxe action for your faces.
check the luxurious-richness-type teleport:

that's what's up.
creamy tofusion cashew chee' on the bottom,
thin potato slices,
leeks,
baconish bits of brown,
and fresh-from-the-Fortress-greenhouse rosemary!!!
expert is as expert does, y'heard?
and i do all my dirt on my own,
but,
i still do it regardless.
***********
tonight is the last night of pizza week.
tomorrow is the first day of my connecticut vacation.
in between,
there's an ice storm rolling in
just to make sure of an added degree of difficulty
in my worrisome and wearisome trek down south.
hard styles abound at all times-
tricksy road and slick paths and unsure footing.
it's all really happening.
and it it was easy,
anyone could do it-
where's the fun in that?
in with a icy escapade in perilous power outages,
and downed limbs?
soulless is the solstice, kids.
happy F*ing winter;
never quiet, never soft.....

my friends.

i made holiday rock bloxxx.
i mean, i kinda had to.
and to do it,
i chopped up a whole heck of a lot of vegan marshmallows.
duders,
those air-puffed mallows?
ugh.
they are the stickiest cubes i've ever sliced into.
seriously.
i had to drop each individual tiny diced marshy mess into
some pre-ground oatflour,
and wipe off the blade i was using with hot water,
after each and every single one.
total pain in the A*.
y'know?
yeah.
but,
once i added some chocolate chips,
and drizzled some icing on 'em,
and added colorway-specific holiday appropriate sprankles,
the effort was rewarded with one hundred percent expertism.
full marks and five stars and all that.
check the teleport:

yum.
that's it.
***********
neighbors,
my friends are good to me.
the XI-mas season is clearly upon us,
and the spirit of gratitude and generosity 
hasn't been lost on my peoples.
first off,
sweet de activated some crafty jauns:

doomsday deathbug alien cyborg dinosaur battle!
that's a thing,
and it's all mine.
then shawn and meryl sent me this sexy wall-mount vasey jammer:

mmmhmmm.
more fresh Folk Life business for my Fortress.
i win?
yeah.
but only because they do, too.
really real ones know about being and recognizing the state of remaining
expert.
and last but not least,
i came home to a rad package from elsah:

a deep dark bark and bitemarked woodsly wodengeist,
as a warrior poetic rooty carving?!
yuuuuuuuuup.
i can't begin to tell you guys how lucky i feel about my friends.
but trust me, anyway-
hyperbole couldn't begin to be adequate enough to satisfy the sentiment.
i'm grateful for the people i call my peoples,
and i'm grateful they think highly enough of me
for them to wager i warrant the effort they make.
it's all really happening,
and i'm better off for all of it;
never quiet, never soft.....

5x5x5x5x5x.....

WOOOOOOO!!!!!
five times the thunder,
five times the fury,
five times the dough,
five times the toppin's,
five times in a mutha-'ucking row!
five is the number, neighbors.
pizza week.
day five.
what did i do about it?
i fired up five flippin' pizzas!
that's it.
we get it in.
the thing is,
i might've just gone easy, if i was all alone-
y'know?
maybe english muff'd a set of smallish slider-style pies...
but,
my equally shark-gluttonous friend beau was around,
and i'm not about to miss out on an opportunity to
activate with a fellow woodsly werewolf
who just so happens to know all about
how totally F*ing expert pizza really is.
so we tandem tag-teamed a synergistic appetite instead.
the more i made,
the more we ate,
the more we ate,
the more we made,
until we were out of dough,
and time,
and room.
yeah.
so without further preamble-
check the heroic thor's-day-thunder-type teleport:

right from the jump-
numero uno goes to eleven.
thinly sliced fresh roma tomato,
daiya chee', g.p.o.p.'d black beans,
frozen corn kernels, scallions,
and a gratuitous cilantro garnish.
i love pizza, kids.
that's real talk.
we slowed it down a bit,
to pace ourselves, with pie number two, too.
teleport:

so much basil,
over crushed tomatoes and olive oil,
with a handful of lightly-sauteed red onion ringlets,
and sweet sweet sweet pineapple.
what happens when it's basil vs. yellow fruit magic?
full flawless face/tongue victory for us.
word.
yep.
then we activated a whole other 'nother level of dopeness.
check it out:

pesto,
whipped-up secret-recipe albie-rock chee' blops,
soysages, and nootch!
holy sh!t, for serious.
this one had some complexity an' that.
mmmhmmm.
duders,
we kept going and going and going.
we're over the middle-mark,
and we rode off on some sourdough dough ball jauns.
look at it,
through the marginally-more-traditional-type teleport:

tomato sauce, asparagus, onions, a little bit of chee',
and a hefty healthy green curly-leaf parsley spray.
what's that, now?
was it good?
what are you?
an A*-hole?
of course it was, c'mon.
jeez.
but,
friends,
what about when there's bits of all kinds of pizza left over,
after all the initial assembly?
yuuuuuuuuup!
you fire up a grand finale.
otherwise,
it's just a fourgy of fresh-to-death flavors.
and we're gonna need a little more than that.
check the smorgasbord teleport:

white pie!
no sauce?
no problem!
shiitakes, and baconish squares, and red peppers,
and little babyleaf kale, too!
that's whole hot layer of my custom chee'-blarp blops
as the base.
uh-huh.
those tofu and cashew and creamy goobieblops are my bottom-b!tch.
that's no joke.
***********
pizza week.
so good for all of us.
and this was yet another successful set.
five more elite circles of spirit and memory and magic?
yes.
get after it;
never quiet, never soft.....

on the fourth day of pizza.....

oh, MAN!
i loooooooove pizza.
that's the honest-to-goodness gospel,
according to the worthy woodsly word-is-bond
true stories being told truly by yours truly.
i mean it, neighbors....
me and pizza pie?
that's amore.
real talk.
and duders?
yeah.
you all already know all about it:
pizza week is so flippin' expert.
that's what's up.
toppings?
did you say you wished there were more toppings?
oh.
okay.
check the top-heavy-type teleport:

tippity-topped off with toppings,
for your hungry hungry hippopotamus mouth.
huh?
of course i'm gonna tell you about it.
calm down.
you start with another 'nother off-the-cuff crust,
this one customized with other other flour powers,
and then there's crushed tomatoes, salted,
with a splash of oregano and rosemary;
and red peppers, sauteed to soften 'em up;
and onions, from the night before, for old times' sake;
and radicchio, because fancy red leafy jauns are dope;
and spinach, since i'm strong 'til the finish;
and fresh basil, for your face,
to feel the hottness and savor the flavor and stuff like that.
yeah.
i needed a vegetable infusion, to activate a few more nutrients-
and that hit the spot.
hmmm?
oh,
well, yes,
definitely.
i obviously had pizza for lunch, too.
c'mon.
it's pizza week.
what am i?
an A*-hole?
check out the elite edible excellence i whipped up,
and rolled out,
and baked off for a midday snack.
teleport:

first-take daiya-stuffed crust, with minimal blowouts?
uh-huh.
beige bits of chicken-styled veggie protein?
yum.
broccoli?
green florets from the future!
stuffed crust goes to eleven, it seems.
and i went along for the trip.
i only brought back crumbs,
but if it's good enough for gretel, and hansel,
it's plenty adequate for a lost traveler on the road to pizza heaven.
wordimus prime.
***********
the wolf.
it's in there.
i guess it's more a non-specific candied candid canid battle beast,
than a dire dopplegangbangin' loco lobo.
y'know?
the point i'm making is-
i've got a post-full moon manic monster slowly returning back to
bard and beard and basic barbarian nature.
words and hair and fury i always carry with me,
it's the teeth and temper and tantrums that get all kinds of amped up
under the silvery threads of skylight at night.
mmmhmmmm.
i rep a hard style,
all checks and imbalances,
with a healthy dose of real real reality,
and fantastic Folk Life,
and imagination inculcation in F*ing full effect.
it's all really happening,
and instead of trying to make sense of it?
yeah.
i'm just making pizza.
nature always wins,
so join the victors,
and share the spoils.
me?
i'm spoiling my daughters with XI-mas magic,
and i'm spoiling my supper with ever more slices of 'za,
and i'm spoiling for a fight, with words, not weapons,
and all of it is better than anything else that could've been.
this is What Is,
and i'm grateful for every frigid, rigid minute of it;
never quiet, never soft.....