mmmhmmm.
nature is providing allll the ripe ones,
and everywhere you go, there's crates and boxes and acres of 'em
all waiting for you to scoople 'em up and start munchin'.
i'm with that, man.
for real.
i love a good bloober.
i mean, they're inevitable in this climate.
and when there's a surplus, there's a call to arms of sorts to make do,
and use 'em up, before the moment passes and they're gone for another 'nother year.
yeah.
fresh blueberries are what we have to work with,
so we're working out what we wanna do with 'em-
check the early-morning pastry-type teleport:
GALETTE ME TELL YOU ALL ABOUT IT!
homemade rustic pastry;
blueberries everywhere;
vegan dark chocolate chips;
and raw cacao paste to black-bottom this big booty b!hhh.
hahaha.
that's a thing.
alright.
so, y'start with the dough, because that's where you do that-
-
*
D'OH!
-
in a medium metal mixing bowl, for all the aesthetics, cut up:
1 stick vegan butts;
3 T vegan creacmhee';
3 T sugar;
1 tsp vanilla;
2 cups flour;
1/4 tsp salt.
when that's a crOmbly mess,
gently stir in very cold non-dairy milk, 1 T at a time,
until the whole mixture stays clumped together when squeezed.
sticky, but not wet, crOmbly, but not dry- it's a process, and it's got a lil bit of feeling in there,
but once you get it right, you've got it down pat for life.
wrap it and refrigerate it for an hour, or a day, or two.....
i made mine the day before, and then ran out of time to make treats in the hours work.
it happens.
lucky for me, i get up early every day, so i'm not missing out on any opportunities
for lack of alert attendance and attention, at least.
uh-huh.
so i preheated my oven to 400 luscious fahrenheit degrees.
and while that was going up in temperature,
i rolled out the dough to 1/4 inch thickness, and divided it in half,
all on a well-floured surface.
a loose circle of rolled dough is all you need to get started,
and that is exxxactly what i now had on hand to make the magic happen.
and that's where the cacao paste comes into play.
-
*
MUDBUTT!
-
3 T powdered sugar;
1 heaped Tablespoon raw cacao;
1 T raw cacao butter, microplaned;
1/2 tsp vanilla;
1 T non-dairy milk +/-....
that's all you need, man.
and you swirl it all up, and spread it all out on that dough, bro.
-
then, there's like a cup and a half of big, fat, swole-up juicy bloobz,
and a handful of chocolate chips.....
and you can see the pleated fan-fold that the edges get ,
to enclose the goodies inside-
and that's when you make it pretty.
yup.
what do you do with the other half of the dough?
you do braids, neighbors.
uh-huh.
braids make it look fancy, and they also mean that there's MORE pastry on there.
....guys, that's a good thing-
MORE pastry is better for everybody.
duh.
bake it for twenty or so minutes, until it looks goldish, and then let it cool a bit.
i know, you wanna eat it right away, right?
riiiiight.
well, maybe make two of them, then?
because the powdered sugar sprankles will melt immediately on a hot one,
and you need the powdery sugar jauns on top.
you really, really do.
rules is rules, fools, don't skip out on the kaPOWder.
it's good for you.
***********
at some point i'll actually have to take time off, and do all these dumb things.
and honestly, i'm under the gun, and riding around on a ticking timebomb of
tempestuous tasks that need tending to.
there's a lot of little tensions tightening up, to the point of attenuation-
and when they snap?
well, all this pent-up blood moon murder, and full-silver-circled werewolfen
anthropomorphic animus anima are gonna spill out over the edges
of my own white-knuckled self-control,
and i'm gonna have myself a good ol' fashioned tantrum.
hmm?
oh, there's no doubt that that will accomplish nothing of any positive consequence;
which is hardly the point, is it?
there's a boiling ocean of obligation just waiting to crash past the damned dams
of reserved composure,
and eff up my resolute new year's lunar initiative.
y'know?
it's fine, guys. really.
pressure cookers are designed to blow off steam,
and still get everything done under the hottest, tensest conditions.
so, i'll still shave hours off of the projected timeframe,
but a little freakin' the eff out may be what i need to do to keep moving forward.
the moon has got me pulled towards blood, love, and rhetoric-
it's all blood, really.
as those of you who know were already aware.
so, get ready, because it's coming up quickly,
and it's all really happening,
so the sequence is set in stone,
and the same nature that made all those delicious berries
put a plan in place for destructive creation and creative destruction,
back and forth and back again,
with room for howling and gnashing and eating all y'all up like a muh-fuhh'n wild thing.
that's the truth as it exists for this weekend;
never quiet, never soft.....
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