dece deuce.

december.
day two.
y'know how, before july and august,
the calendar had ten months?
dec-ember, duders, that's that boom fire, son!
like deca, like 10?
yeah.
even that old math is overly generous.
the big 12, more than eleven, formerly 10,
and so far about a 4.
that's not half bad.....it's worse.
and it's only the second, ninjas.
the hot deuce.
it's thor's day,
and i'm anticipating some thunder, kids.
vido, a client of mine from faraway dallas,
is supposed to be here.
that's the big business, neighbors.
woodsly pre-holiday hot fire in the goodness.
but,
as usual,
philly F*ed up everything.
one hot mess of worst airportiness,
and he's in portland, maine, instead.
a whole day late, and molto dollars short.
(both of us are)
which means i have today off, sort of.
at some point,
he'll probably show up.
i mean, portland is nice an' that,
but i wouldn't cross half the contry ona diagonal axis,
and then skip out on the tatty-scrappin', would you?
right.
and when he shows up all tired, frustrated, bedraggled,
and travel-worn?
then the hell-hammer of throatly fury
will be unleashed on his flippin' neck.
we've got a crow on his leg to blast up, too.
that's a lot of vacation vengeance.
but, it's also just how i get busy......
word.
***********
speaking of less-than-ten, ninjas,
chanukkah starts tonight.
nine nights of chocolate coins and celery soda.
booooooooooo.
i'm not sayin', i'm just sayin':
a holiday where candelabras are the hot symbol??
that's that phantom of the opera holiday jauns.
and we already know that musicals are what?
yep.
turbo-gay.
uh-uh.
boo-ya!
or should i say: boo-yarmulke!!
c'mon.
not that i won't get dizzy spinnin' any dreidels, son.
i'm just speakin' on the reals,
for all my fresh'n'tasty matzo-munching,
flat-cracka mazel tovers out there,
i hope you rock the challah-days as hard as ever,
or whatever.
man, oh maneshevitz!
and, yo-
i'm never ever sayin' we should all keep the christ in christmas,
because that sh!t is uber-weak sauce-
i'm sayin' we should keep the terminator x in x-mas.
fight the power.
whaaaaaat?!
never quiet, never soft.....