yes it is.
check the jabba pose on the teleport, neighbors:
improved by having this monstrous mound of tooth and nail
savagery sluggardly splayed across the foot of my bed.
what am i sayin'?
i'm just sayin',
it's finally not cold inside this spacious, palatial,
Folk Life & Liberty Fortress.
instead,
it's a massive tandoori volcano of grotesque sauna-esque
steam-heat activation from the heating ducts of hell.
too much is the right amount, y'know?
*
are you ready for some football?
the real one i mean...
uh-huh.
y'all would call it soccer.
guess who got involved in a pickup soccer game,
with real goal posts and everything,
in hundred degree heat on the first day of summer?
yeah.
i make choices, kids.
like to show up and try to hang out with some
duders from around,
and kick it about for a bit.
those ninjas wear cleats an sh!t.
uh-huh.
i had on regular sneakers and regular shorts
and i sweat my old, busted, tired regular A* right off.
but i'll be back next week,
sorta like fight club, y'heard?
a good old fashioned physical punishment regimen
may be exactly what i need.
heck,
by the end of the summer,
i'll be a sun-browned barbarian berserker of stamina,
speed, agility, and sore F*ing knees.
ouch.
i've got to go to connecticut, again, tomorrow.
is it too soon for a rematch?
probably.
i'm still sore from last weekend.
but,
my brand-new pair of super-skinny jeans
are actually too big for my belly,
(which is looking like jesus's wracked wreck of a torso)
and i need to swap 'em for a svelter size anyway,
so i'm ready to suit up and get back in the ring
for another bare-knuckled battle-royale with the state
that leaves me in an altered state of semi-consciousness.
yuuuuuuuuuup.
hard mutha-flippin' styles, friends.
until then,
it's already a billion+ degrees of farenheit heat up here,
and there aren't enough sweet moolah-making
movie checks to be had at the studio for me today,
so there's bound to be sprankles and sorbet on the schedule
as a midday reward just for being dope in the face
of a F*tarded clustersuck-bomb of summery scenes.
enduring the weak-sauce of excuse-makers, shortcut-takers,
traffic jams, heat waves, slow-goers,
and willful misunderstanders means frozen fruit
and sugary multi-spectrum shavings for my face,
right down to the tip of the cone.
***********
it's destined to be a day of skylarking and flirting
and generally disregarding the proprieties of decorum
and seriousness.
just like every day.
except today, i'll be much shinier.
hot weather and olive complexions make for a serious
oil-slick sebaceous slime-coating of guido grease.
awwwwwwwww, MAN!
i'll be the sticky stick figure shouting out loud
in the back room, guys.
you'll know me by the glistening sheen of body butter
my pores will be pouring out.
dear hot weather,
i was hoping to create a slip-n-slide inside my clothes.
thanks a whole bunch.
shhhhhh,
if you listen closely,
you can hear my flippy-floppies squish.
no.
i haven't been swimming lately.
that's human juice, ninjas.
you like it;
never quiet, never soft.....
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