toast upgrade.

vegan french toast.
..i know, right?
you thought that wasn't even a thing,
but it is SO a thing.
and we did it, we had it, we ate it all up,
and felt fat and heavy and satisfied by those thick and luscious slabs
of english toasting bread.
hahaha.
i'm for real, english toasting bread french toast.
that's how i doo-doo that freaky sh!t.
neighbors,
we went all out.
check the teleport:

kaBOOMfire.
if standard french toast is like toast being taken to eleven?
we took THAT to eleven, without question.
yup.
i sawed off several exxxtra-wide slices of bread,
let 'em sit out and stale up for a spell,
and made some wizardly breakfast alchemy in a mixing bowl on the side-
i got my almond flour, and ground coconut flakes,
crushed-up flaxseeds and a punch of nootch,
all stirred into a salt-pinched pour of vanilla-laced vanilla soymilk,
with cinnamon, nutmeg, and ginger juicing it up.....
and we buttery pitter-patted down a piping hot pan,
and sizzled that drizzle into all kinds of brown.....
and then really got busy activating some savage stormswept gypsy hottness!!
sliced fresh bananas,
real new hampshire woodsly goodsly maple syrup,
and toasted black walnut sprankles!?!
yuuuuuuuuup.
so expert.
but, wait, there's a whole other 'nother other one,
and that one has some real real sauce-
mostly blueberry (with a few raspberries, too) compote,
with lemon zest and vanilla for fully-functional depth of flavor,
and a scoople of vanilla almond milk ice cream!!!!
woooooooooooooooord.
because too much is the right amount,
and alllllll the nutrients need to get inside my mouth asap.
i don't know about what you guys were into yesterday,
but we had ourselves a super-elite morning munch-up.
an abiding and deeply-ingrained love of shark-gluttonous bite-and-swallow
food indulgence, founded by a powerful love of flavor...
we have a thing we do over here,
and a huge part of it is making ourselves something to eat.
the second half is savoring every morsel as it gets mashed into oblivion
by our enameled masticators while we talk with our mouths full,
in order to fill our hearts and minds at the same time.
this is how we bond, b!tches.
if you can't hang out, don't hang out.
we're here to eat all the treats, and talk all the sh!t-
it's all really happening, and i wouldn't change a thing;
never quiet, never soft.....