no.
you don't understand.....
i'm not kidding-
sandwich week has got me feeling a special kind of way
i mean it.
it's just been bigger big bang after big bang throughOUT the sarnie boomiverse.
and every day's dietary delight;
as in: each individual comestible conquest;
which is to say: all the new new 'guini greatness,
has been a triumphant march through the hallowed halls of my head and my heart.
dudes,
i LOVE sandwiches.
and this time around,
i brought the full force of my deep-rooted italian DNA to the surface.
dudes!!
check out what i did to myself for day sixxx!!!
teleport:
EGGPLANT FRIDAY!!!
kaPOW!!
y'all don't even know,
but you're about to find out!
homemade slow-proofed heroic hoagie sub rolls,
fresh baked in the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress' ever-lovin' oven!
that's mandatory homemade hottness for you, me, and everybody, else.
mmmmmhmmmm.
good bread makes better people,
and i'll take all the help i can get.
-
the insides of this big-bottom b!tchbomb were the TRUTH, tho...
that's real.
slow-roasted red peppers were featured as the base,
coupled with caramelized vidalia onions.
guys,
i had an idea,
and i had to know if it was expert or not,
and the only way to find out was to make the magic happen
and hope it all fell into place where it was supposed to.
sausage and peppers is delicious.
eggplant parm is delicious.
sausage and eggplant parm and peppers????
yup,
it's IN-F*ing-CREDIBLE!!!!
here, go ahead, get right up ON it, b:
c'mon! but, like, for realsies, though-
C'MON!!!
the bath for the eggplant was the best i've made in a while,
and the breading was no joke, either.
friends, here's how it went down:
-
*
EGGPLANT EXTRAVAGANCE!
-
two small thin-skinned italian eggplants, sliced lengthwise,
salted, rested, and rinsed.
-
in a small bowl, combine:
1 cup non-dairy milk;
2 T ground flax/chia-meal;
1 T eggless egg replacer powder;
1 T garbanzo bean flour;
whisk, and allow to get all thick and lovely.
-
in a different small bowl, whisk.crush, and combine:
2 T flour;
1 T cornmeal;
2 T cornstarch;
1 handful crushed cornflakes;
dried oregano, basil, red pepper flakes, black pepper, salt, cayenne,
rosemary, parsley, GPOP, and nutritional yeast.
-
it's a simple matter of activation from there.
dredge through the wet, pat into the dry,
and transfer to hot oil in a big skillet.
one flip each, and you've got sensational sexxxiness ready to rock.
-
of course, that's just phase ONE of a multi-part series of intense and intentional
inventive layering.
i mean, really, did you already forget the rules?
too much is the right amount, man,.
get with it.
-
there's homemade tomato marinara, naturally.
because WTF IS JAR SAUCE?!
wordimus prime.
-
*
TOMATO SAUCINESS!
-
in a small sauce pot,
saute 1/2 small diced onion and 1/2 carrot, minced in 1 T olive oil.
when they soften,
add:
2 T red wine vinegar;
1 tsp soy sauce;
oregano, basil, parsley, sage...
and 2 cups crushed tomatoes.
-
i also added 1/4 cup seitan broth, which was phenomenal.
and a punch of nootch, because that sh!t is TILY af.
real talk.
a slow simmer for thirty minutes had my redness looking hella precise.
*
now, i had my oven hot at 375℉,
and in a small square pan, i layered the following:
oil.
sauce.
eggplant, MORE eggplant.
a proprietarily blended custom cashew-garlic tofu underchee'.
shredded baby kale.
MORE eggplant, then a little MORE eggplant.
MORE sauce, then some shredded daiya mozzarella.
that got baked until the inner and over chee' were appropriately melty,
like, fifteen minutes, max...
and then i dropped that hot multi-tiered tower of terrificness on top of the pepper and onions.
expertism ensued at breakneck pace from there
-
next up?
red lentil seitan sausages, browned, and bias-cut,
laced across the surface of this saucy little sarnie.
plus fresh parsley sprankles.
and fresh basil.
AND thyme and oregano from the garden.
bruh,
what's poppin'???
THIS jaun right here.
and it is a savage raging monstrosity.
a brutal behemoth.
a jaw-dropping juggernaut.
and i ate all eight every last morsel,
with a side order of dippin' sauce.
DAMN.
if you don't get busy with sausage and pepper eggplant parm,
you can't comprehend what the notion of excellence in excess truly is.
and that is no lie.
**********
homemade bread has been the hallmark of the whole week.
also,
we've still been hitting up the fair every night.
mmhmmm.
rules is rules, kids.
and y'wouldn't wanna bring that weak sh!t up in here, would you?
i hope not,
because we WILL have to ask you to leave
if you come diaperbabyishly doodoobuttery with it.
that's word.
the full moon had me up all night after night.
that's no help.
blue lightbeams and werewolfen appetites are kind of my thing,
but i've got a LOT of things lately.
arguably, i've got too many.....
except, that all i'm even interested in these days.
overdoing it is the base line for active participation.
there is only room for MORE.
the biggest, the most beautifullest, the most feral,
the grandest big-timin' one-uppin' grandstandin', showboatin',
high-falutin' hottness is what's really going on.
i'm so grateful for the time i have to do the things i do.
good fortune may be wasted on good storytellers,
but good times are made of mindful and wary awareness
of the wider waking wild world around us.
pay attention, and you just might see something freakin' rad;
never quiet, never soft.....
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