fat flat rollin'.

HEY-O!
me and my too-long-absent ace active answerer,
beau,
just powered down a double barrelled turbo-tube,
each,
of a couple of whole entire large and in charge jumbo-sized
furious, ferocious shark gluttonous flatbread pizza pies.
...for our F*ing faces, mutha-b!tches.
yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
one uncircumcised entire flattieboombattiebread per face,
to be precise, SON!
that's right.
uncut,
and rolled up like a barbarian burrito.
right down the hatch?
uh-huh.
we doo-doo that overachieving eating action.
manly men do manly masticated mayhem,
whenever they get together to get it together.
solid.
***********
XI-mas shopping?
over and out, neighbors.
donez-o.
there are no piles that resemble sheistiness,
in any form.
more importantly,
the stockings are fully flippin' stuffed.
and that's really the mark of a worthy warrior of
gratitude and generosity.
anybody can drop a cache of cash
on a great big somethin'-somethin'.
it's the pure genious of an accurately accented stocking
that separates the experts from the waterbabies.
spoiled rotten over the top treats in a big sock
are what's up.
recognize.
tune in tomorrow,
and i'll finally unveil the mummified monster mitt
we unearthed during the archaeological excavation
underneath the nothing room.
i've waited long enough to debut this thing.
once there's photogenial lightsources to illuminate
the horrific appendage,
i'll gladly share it with all y'all.
crime scene sh!t, duders,
it's all really happening;
never quiet, never soft.....