i don't know if anybody told y'all,
but i F*ing LOVE pizza more than every other food-
that's real.
i could eat pizza every day.
in fact, i eat pizza so often that i skip out on whole huge swaths
of cuisine from around the world that i could be making-
except, none of that worthy mealtime magic is as powerful or compelling as
another 'nother other slice of terrific homemade sorcerous sauce, chee', and crust.
real talk.
pizza rules the roost, and all other food sits below it.
and when i get an urge to splurge?
man, y'all ain't ready for how much heroic hottness is gettin' baked up in here.
mmhmm.
i took a big ol' brownie pan, and i activated the depth charges.
uh-huh.
that's electrifying expertism at it's best, deep-dish-style.
check the mf teleport:
YOOOOOO!!!!!
that's hittin' your eye like amore, right?
right!
two pizzas in one?!
uh-huh....i doo-doo that freaky sh!t.
thiccc crust deepy-d jauns, with superior dough,
and a double-dose of delicious,
dispensed with barbarian brutality across the whole effin' thing.
yes. yes. YES.
it's the best.
- yeah, those are homemade wheatless meatless sausage balls.
- yep, that's slow-cooked manly sauce.
- yes, that's my custm stretchy vegan mozz'.
homemade tastes better, bro.
that's the truth.
-
so,
what's what on this bad boi?
i'll tell you ALL about it-
-
*
DEEPY-D-OUGH!
-
in your dough-hook equipped stand mixer, combine:
1 cup ap flour;
1/2 cup semolina flour;
1/2 cup bread flour;
2 tsp salt;
1 tsp sugar;
3 T fine cornmeal;
3 T olive oil;
1 pkg fast yeast;
1 T bread machine yeast;
1 cup very warm water.
knead all of that up for 11 minutes, wrap it, and refrigerate it for 12 hours.
mmmhmmm.
that's good.
it'll be bulked af. and still ready for more rising when you remove it from the fridge-
i pressed mine into a 9" x 12" well-greased brownie pan,
and let it warm up and get active while my oven heated to 480℉ convection-style.
*
cooked sauce?
yessir.
i'm ON one with that these days.
any decent deep dish needs cooked sauce-
it's kind of a thing.
so, i made that, and it was superb.
-
*
PIZZA SAUCE!
-
in a 1 quart saucepot,
blacken 1 1/2 cups baby grape tomatoes on high heat.
next, add 1 T olive oil;
3 T finely minced onion;
2 cloves crushed garlic.
let the tomatoes burst and the onions gently caramelize in medium heat,
and then return the heat to high, and add 2 T tomato paste;
cook for just a few minutes, and stir in:
2 T nootch;
2 T red wine vinegar;
2 T tamari;
oregano, basil, parsley, sage, rosemary, thyme, to taste,
plus pink salt, black pepper, and lots of Garlic Powder & Onion Powder.
dump in 1 1/2 cups crushed tomatoes;
1/2 cup warm water;
1 T agave,
bring to a boil, then simmer for at least 1 hour on low low, longer is better,
adding water by the T if it gets too burny and thick too quickly-
guys- y'all are gonna get excited about tomato-paste-activation.
it's so flippin' good on a fat pizza pie like this one.
real talk.
sicily and detroit are over here having a baby, and she's a beaut.
wordimus prime.
-
the meatless balls are made like this.
-
the tapioca-tofu chee' is described here.
-
what else?
well,
there's baby spinach and caramelized onions under everything.
on the half with balls,
the tapioca chee' is UNDER the sauce, and there's grated miyoko mozz on top,
with those halved balls over that.
mmhmm.
too much is the right amount.
-
side two is a derivative margherite jaun, only, upgraded to epic burliness.
look:
C'MON.
that's expert in every way.
fresh basil turns it up.
fried garlic and parsley sprankles take it into the future.
rules is rules,
and we can't have be havin' no lame-A* pies produced on my watch, man.
that's real.
***********
i've written about days and days more meals than i've posted to other forms of social media.
i guess that means i just made time to wrap more presents.
that's good news.
december has been a great month for food, duders.
and i'm grateful for that, for sure.
good food makes everything better,
and good pizza takes that a step further....
it's all a big feast, fete, and festival of nourishment over here,
and i'm glad for it;
never quiet, never soft.....
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