SPRANKLES!

it's the sprankles that make or break these cookies, kids.
i mean it.
without those little glittery goobieblops on top, these'd be boring beige bummers,
and THAT'S not how i'm living my life, man.
nope.
i'm no fun. seriously, i'm not.
i freely admit to that.
but, i do eat some darn pretty food, dudes, and that's a fact.
you could say i'm weird.
yeah, yeah, everybody is weird. i know.
but, i mean, it's only because of my extreme aversion to conventional distractions.
really. i just don't wanna do any of that stuff.
no water slides,
no snowmobiles,
no parachutes,
no beachfront sandcastles,
no video games.....
no thanks.
hmm?
well, i'm sure it's all great, it's just not for me.
i'm SO much happier baking something than going somewhere.
i guess that's weird.
i feel more fulfilled creating vegan treats than i do tattooing, even.
and that's saying something substantial, as i tattoo every damned day,
and every damned week, and month, and year, and have for decades now.
yeah.
and i do love my job, compared to every other job-
but the best part of my day is making food.
-
so, when i have a chance to fire up the oven?
i'm already all over it, right away, quick-fast, and in a hurry.
these cookies have quickly become a gluten-free favorite around here,
and that means that i'll be making them often, for sure.
check the teleport:

...like i said, it's those sprankles that do it, right?
uh-huh.
breezy said she likes these the best.
what else could i do besides provide her with a batch?
i mean, c'mon-
what am i?
an A*-hole?
nope.
i'm a baker-man doing the best i can!
i mentioned a week or so ago that these remind me of anginettes.
they still do.
here's the recipe.
you're welcome to amend or adapt it as you see fit.
i'm just telling you what i did, and how.
guys,
we all ate a lot of these.
it'd be hard NOT to. f'real. they dissolve in your mouth.
that's some kind of amazing sweet sugary sorcery, son.
-
*
cookies are good.
you get a great many of them, and they go down really easily.
and this is it.
the last cookies of the year, i think.
we're down to the wire, down to the exposed steel in the treads of december-
the new hottness is headed our way in just a few days.
do you have a resolution yet?
i don't, but i need one.
yeah.
a decreed direction to delve deeper into self-improvement.
becoming a better version of oneself is very subjective, isn't it?
whatever it is you think you need is probably NOT what others see
as the imperative intervention that'll make you better to be around.
how wild is that?
you're over there trying to fix some sh!t you feel acutely needs your attention,
and your closest nearest and dearest have very different ideas
about what the F* is wrong with you.
ha!
it's probably accurate that you're both right, and you're pretty much a mess...
i don't think i'm perfect, or even close to it-
i DO think that every day is a shot at being better.
the last few days have had me back on that good diet and exercise drive-
walking in seriously strained snowy roadways
with my suicidal dog has added a degree of difficulty, though.
yup.
crabtree can't hear cars coming,
but he instinctively knows to try to step out into traffic
and get crushed to roadside confetti whenever one is headed our way.
ugh.
...and guess who looks like a maniac dragging his dumb dog
to safety with a savage snap of the leash?
that's right.
i'm the bad guy,
not letting his best four-legged homeboy get smooshed underneath oncoming tires.
what a jerk, am i right?
that's just the way it is sometimes.
if i was gonna give him some help with a resolution,
i'd suggest he learn about spatial awareness, and situational preparedness.
he's out here happily heading into harm's way,
and it's hard to watch while trudging through ice and snow.
literally, i can't see it happening, and i can't hear sh!t either.
we're a heck of a pair, headed outside with a metaphysical roll of the dice
determining if this'll be the day that we die.
today is the day, maybe;
never quiet, never soft.....