3.14

Pi Day.
i was late to it, as i was driving from southern connecticut up to
northern new hampshire from the pre-dawn hours of the day,
in order to get to work and do my thing.
but,
i did take a minute to make a savory pie crust for the nighttime.
...yeah.
when i have all the feelings, and nowhere to put them,
and no words to help anything?
uh-huh.
i eat my weight in wheat, and bury the rest underneath.
oh, no, i'm not bragging.
ha.
but, anyway, nobody cares about sadness when there's pie,
even if it's a POT PIE.
check it out:

three inch deep fluted pastry sorcery is in full effect.
there's roasted carrots, potatoes, red onions, and celery.
there's blackened cabbage.
there's also plenty of chicken-herbed exxxtra-firm tofu.
and green peas, obvi.
rules is rules, and it isn't a pot pie without peas, bruh
plus, there's the obligatory herbs,
and a bunch of scallions,
and a ton of homemade vegan gravy.
that's right.
too much is the right amount.
anything less is just a pan of bullsh!t.
the oven was up to 450℉.
the veggies roasted in there from the preheat.
the carrots were still firm, but the rest was soffffffft and smooth.
mmmm.
the tofu was fried up in olive oil,
and coated with the patented vegan-roast-chick'n blend:
1/2 tsp rubbed sage;
1 tsp thyme leaves;
1 tsp dried parsley;
1/2 tsp ea GPOP;
1 T nootch;
1/4 tsp crushed rosemary;
black pepper, pink salt;
1 T white wine vinegar;
1 tsp tamari;
1 T warm water-
drizzled and sizzled and sealed onto the surface-
that's how you keep it vegan,
and expert,
and totally real af tasting.
word.
-
the frozen peas go in as is-
-
the cabbage, seared until black on the edges, gets chopped post-fry-up,
to make it manageable and stackable inside the dough.
-
fresh parsley and scallions add some textural sexxxiness,
as well as a shake of each of the herbs again on top of everything.
-
y'just toss it all up and dump it into the pie, and slather all of it with gravy,
and bake it for twenty-five minutes,a nd you're the champion.
that's simple, right?
i s'pose it is, if you know what you're doing.
-
*
DOUGH!
-
in your food processor, combine and pulse together;
2 cups flour;
11 T vegan butter;
2 T vegan creamchee;
1/2 tsp salt;
3-4 T non-dary milk to make it self-adhesive.
cromble it up, and refrigerate it for the afternoon, so it's just righ for rolling later.
do that on a well-floured surface, please, so it doesn't stick.
hmm?
the braids on top?
well, i wanted to eat something pretty, since my mood was so ugly.
...it helped......barely.
-
*
GRAVY!
-
in small saucepot, melt
2 T vegan butter and 3 T ap flour until it smalls nutty and barely begins to brown.
add 1 T nootch;
1/2 tsp ea. GPOP;
2 cups vegan broth,
and turn up the heat to high, stirring while it thickens up.
i usually stir in and extra T of flour, whcked in to ;prevent clumps, too.
that helps it get burlier and better.
believe me, you don't want waterbabyish gravy.
it's too wet to be of use in your pie.
*
i ate half of this bad baby, with the exxxtra gravy-
what?
you used two cups of gravy in your pie?
daaaaaaamn.
that's sloppy.
you're wild.
i used half, and thought it was excessive, but you do you, boo-boo.
Pi Day came and went,
and while i was largely underprepared, i did what i cold to make it dope.
that's the best i can do with what i have to work with;
never quiet, never soft.....