Tuesday, March 26

MELANZANE MONDAY!!

yes i DO love eggplant pizza.
y'know why?
because it's a pain in the A* to make,
which means it's very necessary to have-
the easy way is NOT invited to the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress, man.
nope.
i want that coarse but cultivated, cultured but rustic and rusticated,
forged folksy active participation.
yeah, that's a little harder, and it takes longer, but it feels better,
and at dinnertime? it tastes 200% amazing.
that's real.
so, i made eggplant pizza.
and it was F*ing expert.
teleport:

SHOUTOUTS TO SOURDOUGH CRUST!!!!!
and those crisssssspy herb-crusted eggplant slices were elite on a professional level.
for real.
there's caramelized onions underneath the chee',
and fire roasted tomato sauce on the bottom,
over a firm-but-gentle dust-up of nootch.
yeah.
that was a nice touch.
i wasted some arugula under the eggplant (it blackened and withered to nothin').
but, with a scoople of sauce on top,
and minced daiya as a base, with grated miyoko over all of it?
man,
this was one hell of a superior super-pie, for sure.
and in the interest of real talk: this might've been the most excellent eggplant in an age.
uh-huh.
i blended up the breading in the food processor.
i dunno if that's what made it so good, or what, but it really had somethin' special going on.
-
*
MELANZANE!
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i had thinly sliced skin-on italian eggplants, salted, and rinsed, and ready to go.
-
in one bowl, there was 1 cup of soymilk, with 2 tsp nootch,
and 1 T ground blended chia-flaxmeal, whisked and bloomed, and sticky.
-
in the other bowl, there were cornflakes and crisped rice, a small scoop of wheat flour,
and another other 'nother scoople of quinoa flour,
and oregano, rosemary, basil, thyme, black pepper, sage, nootch,
and GPOP, all stirred together....
-
wait, now that i think about it, it was the double-dredge that did it.
yeah.
a dunk, a dry dab, another dunk, and MORE herby goodness.
duh.
too much is the right amount,
and twice as much crusty crissspiness is way better than just a single-dunk scenario.
of course it is.
-
i had 1/4 cup of vegetable oil getting hella hot in a great big pan,
and i sizzled all my discs to a golden brown finish on both sides.
i also put 'em on paper towels to siphon off some of that fatty-fat-fat.
i like a good crisp eggplant, but fried stuff wants me to die fast which makes me
take measures to stay alive-
like allowing the oil to get crazy hot so it doesn't soak in as deep,
and still dabbin' some off after anyway.
yeah.
*
so the eggplant was dope.
the sauce was just crushed tomatoes.
the daiya was minced because rules is rules, and better is better, bro.
the shreds aren't as awesome, and that's a fact.
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how about the dough?
for being pretty sloppy, it was still pretty tight.
-
*
SOURDOUGH PIZZA CRUST!
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that's 1/4 cup sourdough starter;
2 1/4 cups flour;
2 tsp sea salt;
and 1 cup warm water.
all beat the eff up for 11 minutes on medium-high speed in the stand-up mixer,
until a tight, firm shiny gluten-activated ball formed.
it bulked and fed and fermented all dang day, covered on the counter,
and i spread that wet mess on my well-seasoned oiled steel baking pan.
and that rose more while the oven heated and the eggplant fried and the onion caramelized.
mmmmmmmm.
the oven was at 480℉ with that convection circulation sensational sexxxiness.
and the whole pie baked for a little longer than a traditional dough would.
that wet sourdough needs more attention, but i'm cool with that.
the crust is so crispy, and so firm, with nearly zero flop.
even loaded with all that stuff. which included MORE sauce,
and grated miyoko mozz, and fried garlic sprankles, of course!!
and when it came out piping hot,
you KNOW i had to hit it with that freshie-fresh basil, boi!
THAT'S expert all the way to eleven and then some.
*
after a loooong day of painful finger-breaking tattooing, i just need that pizza.
pizza makes me feel a little better even though it takes forever to make.
i guess a little effort never hurt anybody.
an eggplant pizza is seriously something magic.
it's got whole processes that need attention.
it is NOT a fast one.
it is NOT the easiest.
it IS one of the best.
i'm applying that formula to my whole F*ing life.
hard styles, long nights, tough times, difficult situations-
that's the oven i'm cooking my real life inside.
it's not fast, it's not easy, but it is What Is.
i think there's something good coming out, sooner than later;
never quiet, never soft.....

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