shout it out loud for crying out loud.

i'm gonna listen to a whole bunch of KISS today.
i mean,
talk about being ugly and being dope.
also, the idea of a custom costume party ,
with a perfectly paired soundtrack
sounds pretty flippin' rad to the nads right now.
so it's probably a day for tattzyblastulating in a wide brimmed wizard hat,
and some killer face paint, even.
i've got a great comb for teasing out my hair,
and i'm ready to rock and roll all night, an' all the rest.
i need it.
i really do.
hell, we need it, both myself and my lovely ladybride.
for that matter,
you might even need it.
makeshift special occasions are what's poppin', my ninjas.
today can be a weak sauce weekend waste,
or a criminy all the time-iny execution of crucial barbecue barbecution!
that's killer barbecue awesomeness, y'heard?
please though, tofu and veggie kabobs only,
save the meat for your lovers!
(c'mon, i already told you it's a KISS sunday over here)
go buy destroyer, and turn it all the way up.
(you know the routine, right?)
loud and hard and heavy and metal.
save the double bass and acid-throated gridcore goretards for later,
today it's all about rock city!!!
.....that's the only city i get amped on.

we looked at another couple houses.
one was beat the F* up, and could've been so dope
if the owners hadn't gaytardified it.
what a bummer.
it had so much going for it:
acres of brooks and woods, super oldness,
scary basement business, giant timberframes.
BUT,
what about the closed-up chimneys, and the water damage,
and the assplosive kitchen, and the heinous-like-my-anus carpeting?
puke central!
too much would have to be done, too soon, to make it worth it.
we also saw a house that had absolutely nothing wrong with it.
three garages. acreage. tons of storage. nice gardens.
but,
it also had NO flavor....
i mean, screened in porch or not, kids,
i'm just not a faux-wood floor and single story ranch kind of mutha-ucka.
i want character, not convenience.
i need history and old-money fallen on hard-times aesthetics.
i doo-doo all that kind of haunted hallowe'en house type of sh!t.
do you know what i'm talking about?
we want that farmhouse that's been the dope fortress of freshness,
for over a hundred years;
remember that 1986 movie, house?
oh yeah.
or psycho?
hell yeah.
or clue? 
the first floor of the house from
the rocky horror picture show? 
that sh!t is what i'm talking about
i want that kooky old sherlock holmesian steez weasel style, ya'll.
it's out there, waiting patiently,
gettin' older and louder and doper,
for jess and i to scoople it up.
don't worry creepy old hottness,
we're comin'....
never quiet, never soft....