sunny day?

uh-huh.
wow.
good guess.
i AM tattooing two different tribal pentagrams on some dude today.
are you keeping score?
because that's two-zip, ya'll.
...winning.
it's what i doo-doo.

are kazoos dope?
wait.
what?
yeah, kazoos.
y'know,
if you can hum then you can play, an' that.
i think they might be.
and i'm serious.
the metal ones are the most fresh, too.
i saw some lady at Bread & Puppet this summer playing one.
only, she had it hooked up to an old bicycle squeeze-horn where the bulb goes.
oh yeah, i know.
instead of being all boring and honky,
it was a full-blown barbarian battle megaphone!
a kazoogle, even.
if you happen to have one of those horns, then give it here, ninja.
i'll break out my long-disused soldering gear,
from waaaaay back when i used to make my own tattoo needles,
and i'll have a whole humpet trumpet section selection right off.
add in my supremely kickass bugle,
and some 5 gallon bucket drums,
and we've got a whole bass-boosted stormswept gypsy traveling band setup.
that'll make me more popular with the general populace, i'm sure.
nothing screams 'sexy' like a bucket-kicking hummer!
(that's what she said)

tonight holds the heady promise of hot fire.
too bad it's hard to get hot with wet wood.
(again, exactly what she said)
we'll see if there's any luck bruning down the joint,
all dewy doo-doo buttery an' that.
my single strike anywhere matchstick tricks will be sorely pressed.
ah well.
there'll either be a smoggy smolder or a raging rager,
but whichever winds out,
i'll be outside all by my lonesome.
jess has a ladies' night slumber party tonight.
i'm SO sure it's all lingerie and pillow fights.
but more importantly,
it means i'm on solo-flight lone-wolf rogue squadron man-time.
what does a barbarian battle bard get busy with when left to his own devices?
how does he get all apesh!t bananas crazy with no one to rein him in?
well,
for starters,
i might do some chores.
then,
if i'm ready to get really nutty,
i might eat a baked potato,
and once that's outta the way and i'm all warmed up,
i'll finally settle in for some leisurely reading.
sorry, ya'll.
i mostly kinda suck all by myself.
empty houses and empty pockets make for boring nights;
never quiet, never soft.....