Wednesday, February 10

dulce y ahumado.

duders,
i got that mexican/hungarian connection.
y'know:
pimento peppers.
the same peppers that constitute
those little red dots that go into olives,
get ground up to make paprika.
a.k.a. the homefries dye.
i got some gourmet paprika blends, ya'll.
y'know anything about el avion?
it's the airplane brand!
ever heard of it?
me neither.
but i got the sweet and the smoked varieties,
and i've already tried 'em.
they're deliciously red-orange.
it's not so much a flavor as an aura or something.
it's super-concentrated.
i had orange fingers, orange lips, orange counter-tops.
and an orange tongue that was pretty psyched, too.
that smoked-out jauns is off-the-hinges good.
regular people put beach sand and seashells,
or authentic river rocks,
or some other small decorative sh!t in these glass cases.
for fancying up guest bathrooms or whatever,
just to sneak the hint of classiness into their spot.
little ol' grandmas put candy in 'em.
crazy old grandpas make moonshine inside of 'em.
not us.
we run it straight-up terrarium style.
green thumbs an' that.
african violet, fern, and curly willow, my ninjas.
that's what we put in it.
my better half has been talking about this business
since i got her a book with crafty ideas in it at XI-mas.
and now it's really happening.
when we spend a day off together,
anything can happen.
and when i say anything,
i mean it usually involves t.j. maxx and home depot.
we got nails, hinges, plant stuff, interior paint, a rug,
some pillows, brand-new usa-made lodge cast iron skillets,
and an orchid that was too long for the glass case.
so,
then we went to the scary, crazy-person florist to snatch
some more size-appropriate flora for our clear crystal cloche .
that was some big, up-here, hills-have-eyes action.
actually, more like the hills have flowers.
(it's called hill's florist)
brian hill is no F*n' joke.
part mad scientist, part fish hatchery pro,
part mountain man, part crazy-eyed professor,
he hooked us up with some free clippings and cuttings,
some knowledge, and a tour of his
overwhelmingly crowded clutterbin greenhouse...
not bad for an unguessably-old woodsman.
we got home and set up our sweet treats.
pilows and rugs are in place.
paint is stirred and set to coat our walls and doors.
paprika is prepared to pigment our plates.
we're ready.
days off?
not hardly.
days lived hard?
you know this, ninjas.
hail seitan!
i always get a little grossed out
when i'm boiling up a batch of bread-based protein.
it's all blobbity and wet.
squeaky slabs of soy-soaked steakiness.
it's gross.
i'm just sayin';
but once i hit it with some flour, salt, pepper, and paprika,
and set it to sizzling in my new skillfully seasoned skillet,
it was all well worth it.
after a busy day of improving our home,
we hunkered down to expand our waistlines,
if not our horizons.
it was warm out.
the food was hot.
the fire was raging.
and the hottness was all around us.
good times, duders;
never quiet, never soft.....

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