Tuesday, October 8


i made a special cake for a special person.
i might've not mentioned it before,
but i've made some seemingly insignificant yet substantial changes in my life.
it's true.
when you live like a weird hermit with no one to answer to
for a large chunk of your fully-formed adult life,
it gets impossible to imagine NOT doing things the way you already like them.
i mean, why would you?
there's comfort in routine, and structure is essential for obsessives like me.
that said: 
at one point, for decades, in fact- i swore i'd never get a mobile phone.
...then i did.
i swore i'd never get any apple products because i don't buy the hype.
now i have three, including the phone i'm looking at too much.
(i still don't buy the hype, but they stuck me for my papers anyway)
i also swore that carrot cake was NOT invited to the party.
carrots are for food, not treats i said.
there's HOW many blog posts on this thing,
and there's no carrot cakes...
and yet,
when breezy says she wants a gluten-free carrot cake?
immediately, i set out to make that vegan supersweetness for her,
and i look up recipes on my iphone that she strongly suggested to me to get...
i guess when you really like someone you do things you said you wouldn't.
i barely used a recipe at all when all was said and done.
that's my style.
i'm NOT ever giving in to the box-mix, man.
i saw some general proportions-
i wasn't sure how much carrot to use, mostly....
then i fired up the oven and got to work:

here's how it went down:
preheat your oven to 375℉
grease two 8" cake tins with coconut oil, set aside.
in a medium-sized mixing bowl, combine:
1/3 cup dark brown sugar;
1/3 cup demerara sugar;
1/3 cup sugar;
1/2 tsp salt;
2 tsp vanilla;
2 tsp cinnamon;
1/2 tsp ginger, nutmeg;
1/4 tsp allspice;
dash of cloves;
1 stick (8 T) vegan butter.
cream that all up,
then add:
1/2 cup unsweetened plain coconut yogurt;
1 T powdered egg replacer;
1 1/2 cup grated carrot;
1/2 cup mama's gf almond flour blend;
1/2 cup bob's 1:1 gf rice based flour blend;
1 cup bob's ap gf flour;
1/4 cup tapioca flour;
1/4 cup medium-flake unsweetened coconut;
1/2 cup chopped walnuts;
2 tsp baking powder;
1 tsp baking soda;
1/2 cup random gf baking flour
(this one was arrowhead mills ancient grain blend);
you need diversity in flours if you want gf baking to WORK.
that's a thing.
and 3/4 cup nondairy milk.
stir it up, and mix it all together nicey-nice,
spread it evenly between those two pans,
and bake them both for 33 minutes.
that's it.
you're a miracle now.
when they've cooled, y'gotta stick 'em up with that creamchee' frostin'.
that's the mandatory topping i guess.
rules is rules and that's a fact,
so i did what i do-
in a stand mixer with the whisk affixed, whip up:
3 cups powdered sugar;
1 tsp vanilla;
1 stick vegan butter;
3 T vegan creamchee';
1/4 cup non-dairy milk.
that's it. make it fluffy.
i added orange for carrot indication, too,
because cakes should be pretty, especially when they're for a pretty lady.
that's no joke.
...and there's cinnamon sprankles.
and there's coconut sprankles.
because too much is the right amount.
and that's all there is to it.
if it's cake, i'm for it.
if it's most other things, i'll probably sit it out;
never quiet, never soft.....

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