Tuesday, October 8

THE GREAT PUMPKIN.

she's the roundest and the happiest and that's a fact.

she's loved by all who know her,
and she's thriving because of it.
also, she's THE cutest.

true story.
she also just happens to look SO much like her mama.
i like that.
nobody has an easy time looking like me.
i'm relieved she avoided that obstacle.
hahaha.
anyway,
lilli is nestled in among a small army of little people who are all growing together
and becoming the best versions of themselves.
that's about as excellent a process as anybody could ask for.
siblings who act like built-in best friends?
i'm jealous, but not really.
i'm happy about it.
or happy-sad about it.
something where my eyes get wet,
and i have all these feelings in my heart and in my head.
i can't even stand the four of them together.
it's a dynamic that still surprises me.
and what do i do when i have too many feelings??
mostly,
i just pack up chunks of my previous lifetime into bags and boxes,
and throw them away.
i can't believe there's so much i've missed during these increasingly frequent purges.
seriously, there's still so much that each evacuation seems to have not noticed.
if i get rid of everything that ever happened,
maybe that'll make the future more endurable?
how soon is now?
i'm serious.
also, that's my theme song for today.
shoutouts to morrissey before he got racist for writing the words that get it;
never quiet, never soft.....

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