neighbors,
MAY THE FOURTH BE WITH YOU.
yuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
i'm reppin' some star wars day celebration
like a mighty sarlacc-sucking mutha-ucker.
really i'm much more like jabba, though, y'know.
a fat, gross, ugly gangster-A* duder,
acting like a hard-style monster,
but really getting slowly strangled to death
by a super hot chick.
awwwwww, man!
you like it, admit it.
okay.
...let's be real,
when the whomp-rats and the minocs settle down,
and the wookie fur sheds itself off my body,
i'm an unfortunately jar-jar kind of guy.
lanky, irritating, affectation-heavy, gimmicky,
and generally ruining the experience for everybody else.
c'mon.
meesa no thinky- i'ma wrong.
...as much as i'd like to imagine i'd be the sick sith slick one
force-choking b!tches and flicking lightning out of my fingers,
i'm just not lightsaber-wielding material.
not red, nor purple, or any otherwise jedi-appropriate hue.
space laser nutrients are more my speed-
maybe a han solo-type space pirate,
but probably more of a greedy greedo ninja,
before that shooting-first sack of sh!t, too.
wooooooooord.
***********
it's my last day at work for another 'nother week.
you'd almost think i was trying to hurt myself.
or save myself.
or both.
i'm also only working a half-day.
...if i'm even working at all.
those long shots and midi-chlorian windfalls
aren't interfering on my behalf, lately.
just sayin',
i've got a bad feeling about this.
huh?
in real life,
sebulba always wins;
that's no bantha poodoo.
and like a toydarian,
mind tricks don't work on me,
only money.
it's cold, wet, and rainy as heck here
in the white mountains' very own
woodsly goodness,
my very own dagobah,
complete with mirror-image dark side cave.
it's all really happening,
tomorrow, i jump to light speed,
and activate some maximum minneapolis.
get ready, daddy's house,
i'm coming over;
never quiet, never soft.....73
Friday, May 4
Thursday, May 3
wolfen.
the moon has been trying to trick me, kids.
yeah.
hiding behind a thick blanket of cloudy crap,
creeping along towards berserker werewolfen fury
like i wouldn't feel it deep inside my hirsute hide.
c'mon.
it's very nearly full to bursting,
and it's not the only one.
time, the elements, and circumstance, neighbors.
a collision of catastrophic calamities,
overlapping in concentrated concentric circles
of spirit and memory and stormswept activation.
*
my car isn't broke,
but now i am.
sweet;
never quiet, never soft.....72
yeah.
hiding behind a thick blanket of cloudy crap,
creeping along towards berserker werewolfen fury
like i wouldn't feel it deep inside my hirsute hide.
c'mon.
it's very nearly full to bursting,
and it's not the only one.
time, the elements, and circumstance, neighbors.
a collision of catastrophic calamities,
overlapping in concentrated concentric circles
of spirit and memory and stormswept activation.
*
my car isn't broke,
but now i am.
sweet;
never quiet, never soft.....72
hats.
a brand new homemade upcycled
repurposed fabric activational red cap, my ninjas.
that's how i got rewarded for a fat pile
of active participation on an interpersonal basis.
huh?
oh,
check the teleport:
yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
that's some handstitched previously shirt cloth
currently transformed into hat-type styles of
nutrient-rich headwear for my perpetually big dome.
oh, and that so IS a F*ing totoro, yo.
thanks to my little bitty teensy-tiny young homegirl,
sweet de,
she doo-doos that stitchy sh!t for my face.
it fits great, it's pure zissou color,
and it's mythologically accurate.
what's that, duders?
oh,
c'mon.
you know...powries.
murderous dwarven waylayers of wayfarers an' that.
i'm into it.
just sayin'.
***********
there are no time outs, kids.
just time away.
i'm on that jauns like a professional.
time away from the fortress,
time out of the house, on that travel-time time travel
from here into the past,
by just one hour, for some parade day may day
belated celebratory active participation with
some of my most dedicated motivated enervated ones.
or,
a molto ambitious mutha-'ucka, and his peoples.
*
shame on the rest of ya'll.
that's right.
so far,
the only reciprocating member of my unofficial
postcard club are my neighbors from the even more north.
for serious,
i've only gotten one card in response to my
competent and coherent communiques to the future,
from the right flippin' now-
check the teleport, and recognize where realness lives:
uh-huh.
berlin, new hampshire gets busier than you.
temporally and situationally site-specific subject matter?
yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
hang your heads, kids;
never quiet, never soft.....72
repurposed fabric activational red cap, my ninjas.
that's how i got rewarded for a fat pile
of active participation on an interpersonal basis.
huh?
oh,
check the teleport:
that's some handstitched previously shirt cloth
currently transformed into hat-type styles of
nutrient-rich headwear for my perpetually big dome.
oh, and that so IS a F*ing totoro, yo.
thanks to my little bitty teensy-tiny young homegirl,
sweet de,
she doo-doos that stitchy sh!t for my face.
it fits great, it's pure zissou color,
and it's mythologically accurate.
what's that, duders?
oh,
c'mon.
you know...powries.
murderous dwarven waylayers of wayfarers an' that.
i'm into it.
just sayin'.
***********
there are no time outs, kids.
just time away.
i'm on that jauns like a professional.
time away from the fortress,
time out of the house, on that travel-time time travel
from here into the past,
by just one hour, for some parade day may day
belated celebratory active participation with
some of my most dedicated motivated enervated ones.
or,
a molto ambitious mutha-'ucka, and his peoples.
*
shame on the rest of ya'll.
that's right.
so far,
the only reciprocating member of my unofficial
postcard club are my neighbors from the even more north.
for serious,
i've only gotten one card in response to my
competent and coherent communiques to the future,
from the right flippin' now-
check the teleport, and recognize where realness lives:
berlin, new hampshire gets busier than you.
temporally and situationally site-specific subject matter?
yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
hang your heads, kids;
never quiet, never soft.....72
Wednesday, May 2
belated bunny banter.
rabbit, rabbit, duders?
you'd better believe it.
did it instantly conjure up a cauldron of
rekindled kindred on the calens?
...nope.
how about just a basic smattering of good luck?
yeah, you'd like that, wouldn't you?
c'mon.
worthy warrior poets don't get lucky,
they get busy.
fact.
april showers all may day long?
yuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
we're a little behind up here in the woodsly goodness.
if that's the case,
then just how did we get our workers' righteousness
activated and acclimated to a distressing day of
potential rebirth and fertility?
we didn't,
but i did get an extra-sexy brand spankin' new haircut.
or, i should say, i punished the few remaining strands
with a severe scissorly snipish snipping.
take that, terrible top of my head.
i also made some postcards.
check the teleport:
c'mon.
-
...and i got that real-life scrabble board.
that way,
i can feel even less like i'm conversing,
even in suggestive triple word bursts,
as unfriendly wordsmiths are
electronically interacting right next to me.
awwwwwwww, man!
***********
i made a trip to portland, maine today.
we saw the newly minted tsunami tattoo studio.
duders,
it's nicer than yours.
i promise.
and of course, since we were in the area,
we tuned up some green elephantitis.
albeit far less than the usual gluttonous gorge-out.
huh?
responsible consumption?
don't worry, my ninjas,
i'm sure there will be plenty of inappropriate ingestion
whilst i'm activating my participation in
minnesotan mayhem.
you wouldn't want to blow it too early, would you?
see?
it's never easy,
and it's never not really happening.
actually,
you'd be surprised how much isn't happening.
the weekend is over,
but i'm off this actual weekend,
so there's definitely balance in the force,
but the dark side seems poised to get real heavy;
never quiet, never soft.....71
you'd better believe it.
did it instantly conjure up a cauldron of
rekindled kindred on the calens?
...nope.
how about just a basic smattering of good luck?
yeah, you'd like that, wouldn't you?
c'mon.
worthy warrior poets don't get lucky,
they get busy.
fact.
april showers all may day long?
yuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
we're a little behind up here in the woodsly goodness.
if that's the case,
then just how did we get our workers' righteousness
activated and acclimated to a distressing day of
potential rebirth and fertility?
we didn't,
but i did get an extra-sexy brand spankin' new haircut.
or, i should say, i punished the few remaining strands
with a severe scissorly snipish snipping.
take that, terrible top of my head.
i also made some postcards.
check the teleport:
-
...and i got that real-life scrabble board.
that way,
i can feel even less like i'm conversing,
even in suggestive triple word bursts,
as unfriendly wordsmiths are
electronically interacting right next to me.
awwwwwwww, man!
***********
i made a trip to portland, maine today.
we saw the newly minted tsunami tattoo studio.
duders,
it's nicer than yours.
i promise.
and of course, since we were in the area,
we tuned up some green elephantitis.
albeit far less than the usual gluttonous gorge-out.
huh?
responsible consumption?
don't worry, my ninjas,
i'm sure there will be plenty of inappropriate ingestion
whilst i'm activating my participation in
minnesotan mayhem.
you wouldn't want to blow it too early, would you?
see?
it's never easy,
and it's never not really happening.
actually,
you'd be surprised how much isn't happening.
the weekend is over,
but i'm off this actual weekend,
so there's definitely balance in the force,
but the dark side seems poised to get real heavy;
never quiet, never soft.....71
Tuesday, May 1
Monday, April 30
nobody leaves with the title.
neighbors,
you guessed it.
flawless failure for your face,
and no mutha-flippin' movie checks for mine.
uh-huh.
another bust-out,
just to send april packing as a total loss.
yuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
one last zero day.
no appointments, no walk-ins.
one more zero hour.
still nil,
still happening.
i can appreciate the scorched-earth
pyrrhic-type self-destructive jauns, y'all.
it's What Is, today and every day;
never quiet, never soft.....69
you guessed it.
flawless failure for your face,
and no mutha-flippin' movie checks for mine.
uh-huh.
another bust-out,
just to send april packing as a total loss.
yuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
one last zero day.
no appointments, no walk-ins.
one more zero hour.
still nil,
still happening.
i can appreciate the scorched-earth
pyrrhic-type self-destructive jauns, y'all.
it's What Is, today and every day;
never quiet, never soft.....69
over and out.
postcards, y'all.
that's the biggest piece of action that activated
and constituted the whole entire month of april.
yeah.
cut and pasted paper, posted on indexed cards,
and sent off to points known and otherwise.
what.
the.
F*.
it's an incisively indecisive style
of diamond-grade hardness, neighbors.
the mohs,brinell, and especially the rockwell,
and albie rock-well charts all confirm it.
it's hard.
(NOT what she said)
postage stamps and zip codes.
i doo-doo that area-specific numerology sh!t, son.
it's over.
april, i mean.
not postcards.
i've still got stamps after all,
so we're gonna run out the remainder,
and tape up the results before too long.
don't worry, ninjas,
i'm on it-
still want one?
send your address to me:
battlebeasteleven@gmail.com
i can send you a one-of-a-kind text message.
printed out, longhand and sh!t.
that's right, in print, A*-hole.
recognize.
***********
oh,
have you minky mutha-'uckas ever
been active participants in a standstill?
oh, really?
well, that's too bad.
i'm getting busy making moves that
only go nowhere,
and i've been demonstrating my styles
of infinite natural hardness for some time now.
indelible.
that's the adjective.
indelible.
marky markings that last beyond the past,
supercede the present,
and cast their shadowy blots and blarps
on the entirety of the future.
awwwwwwwwwwww.
going nowhere because the lines between
then and now and later on have been smeared
with a brutal stain of barbarian blood and guts?
that's apparently a thing.
a set of hard styles, coupled with hard feelings
that trivialize each and every effort to move ahead.
i've never done more,
and i've never reaped a less impressive harvest.
sometimes, it's all really happening,
but because the future is where i'm at,
it's already too late?
i don't know, yo.
but,
it's definitely something to consider;
never quiet, never soft..... 69
that's the biggest piece of action that activated
and constituted the whole entire month of april.
yeah.
cut and pasted paper, posted on indexed cards,
and sent off to points known and otherwise.
what.
the.
F*.
it's an incisively indecisive style
of diamond-grade hardness, neighbors.
the mohs,brinell, and especially the rockwell,
and albie rock-well charts all confirm it.
it's hard.
(NOT what she said)
postage stamps and zip codes.
i doo-doo that area-specific numerology sh!t, son.
it's over.
april, i mean.
not postcards.
i've still got stamps after all,
so we're gonna run out the remainder,
and tape up the results before too long.
don't worry, ninjas,
i'm on it-
send your address to me:
battlebeasteleven@gmail.com
i can send you a one-of-a-kind text message.
printed out, longhand and sh!t.
that's right, in print, A*-hole.
recognize.
***********
oh,
have you minky mutha-'uckas ever
been active participants in a standstill?
oh, really?
well, that's too bad.
i'm getting busy making moves that
only go nowhere,
and i've been demonstrating my styles
of infinite natural hardness for some time now.
indelible.
that's the adjective.
indelible.
marky markings that last beyond the past,
supercede the present,
and cast their shadowy blots and blarps
on the entirety of the future.
awwwwwwwwwwww.
going nowhere because the lines between
then and now and later on have been smeared
with a brutal stain of barbarian blood and guts?
that's apparently a thing.
a set of hard styles, coupled with hard feelings
that trivialize each and every effort to move ahead.
i've never done more,
and i've never reaped a less impressive harvest.
sometimes, it's all really happening,
but because the future is where i'm at,
it's already too late?
i don't know, yo.
but,
it's definitely something to consider;
never quiet, never soft..... 69
Sunday, April 29
big head.
neighbors,
i just don't really want to type anything.
check the teleport:
that's it.
a busted picture of an alright tattoo.
no.
you can't get anything else with that;
never quiet, never soft.....
i just don't really want to type anything.
check the teleport:
that's it.
a busted picture of an alright tattoo.
no.
you can't get anything else with that;
never quiet, never soft.....
Saturday, April 28
uncle steven's clubhouse!
duders,
what's better than strange days
full of estranged entanglements?
you guessed it-
family togetherness,
only now with added in-laws!!!
boo-YA, my ninjas.
all my other other family is here.
here, in the white mountains valley.
here, in the woodsly goodness.
here, in F*ing full effect.
that's no joke.
for real, are you laughing?
well, stop it.
how often is a two hour dinner the
perfect pretext to a pretentious, portentous spanning
of a sorcerously weak saucy saturday night ...live?
yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
good call, y'all.
not once, not never, no way.
then again,
a whole cast of characters who happen
to make sure it all is really happening,
hampering the happenstance and circumstance
of warrior poetry in motion,
and grinding the process of epic meal time to
a stock-stone-standstill is something
that real life documentarians won't ever
pass up an opportunity to witness.
...fact.
it is what's going on.
***********
philosophical fury, kids.
that's how i decided to deliver the day's doings.
doo-doo buttery discourse on the nature of
giving a grand total of zero F*s in a row.
if you can't hang out, get out.
that's the way i'm liking that sh!t, neighbors.
i've got no time for fake ones, y'heard?
it's time to reiterate the raging stormswept berserker
barbarian battle-beastly hot fire phrase that fits
each and every situation across the nation:
just be dope,
or F* right off.
recognize the really realness,
absord the turbo hottness,
and get busy getting busy with that big business, b!tches.
zero F*s, y'all,
in every conceivable sense;
never quiet, never soft.....
what's better than strange days
full of estranged entanglements?
you guessed it-
family togetherness,
only now with added in-laws!!!
boo-YA, my ninjas.
all my other other family is here.
here, in the white mountains valley.
here, in the woodsly goodness.
here, in F*ing full effect.
that's no joke.
for real, are you laughing?
well, stop it.
how often is a two hour dinner the
perfect pretext to a pretentious, portentous spanning
of a sorcerously weak saucy saturday night ...live?
yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
good call, y'all.
not once, not never, no way.
then again,
a whole cast of characters who happen
to make sure it all is really happening,
hampering the happenstance and circumstance
of warrior poetry in motion,
and grinding the process of epic meal time to
a stock-stone-standstill is something
that real life documentarians won't ever
pass up an opportunity to witness.
...fact.
it is what's going on.
***********
philosophical fury, kids.
that's how i decided to deliver the day's doings.
doo-doo buttery discourse on the nature of
giving a grand total of zero F*s in a row.
if you can't hang out, get out.
that's the way i'm liking that sh!t, neighbors.
i've got no time for fake ones, y'heard?
it's time to reiterate the raging stormswept berserker
barbarian battle-beastly hot fire phrase that fits
each and every situation across the nation:
just be dope,
or F* right off.
recognize the really realness,
absord the turbo hottness,
and get busy getting busy with that big business, b!tches.
zero F*s, y'all,
in every conceivable sense;
never quiet, never soft.....
Friday, April 27
moustache rides?
oh, MAN!
when you've got time to write about your day,
right smack dab in the middle of while it's
all really happening might just mean
that it's not exactly an event-filled explosion of
busy business and magic move-making activation.
ummmm,
i'm not sure nothing is going to happen,
but as of this moment?
lame cake.
it's F*ing windy, too.
you ninjas all know that's my favorite elemental
expression of ma nature's infinite b!tchbaggery.
and as i still haven't polymorphed into a pinwheel,
i've got to be honest-
wind sucks all the balls that have ever hung out.
that's real.
***********
there have been masses of the masses holding
black masses and moving as slow as molasses
milling and mucking about here in the mountains.
i can't figure it out, y'all.
stump creatures and swamp hogs and sad sacks of sh!t
must need extra attention this weekend.
great.
i was hoping to absorb some environmental ooze
exuding off the semi-conscious incogent craptards
who're taking up all the available space
in my immediate area.
*
blade runner?!
yuuuuuup.
that's how you cap off a freaky-diki friday,
for sure, kids.
replicant retirement.
that's all there is;
never quiet, never soft.....
when you've got time to write about your day,
right smack dab in the middle of while it's
all really happening might just mean
that it's not exactly an event-filled explosion of
busy business and magic move-making activation.
ummmm,
i'm not sure nothing is going to happen,
but as of this moment?
lame cake.
it's F*ing windy, too.
you ninjas all know that's my favorite elemental
expression of ma nature's infinite b!tchbaggery.
and as i still haven't polymorphed into a pinwheel,
i've got to be honest-
wind sucks all the balls that have ever hung out.
that's real.
***********
there have been masses of the masses holding
black masses and moving as slow as molasses
milling and mucking about here in the mountains.
i can't figure it out, y'all.
stump creatures and swamp hogs and sad sacks of sh!t
must need extra attention this weekend.
great.
i was hoping to absorb some environmental ooze
exuding off the semi-conscious incogent craptards
who're taking up all the available space
in my immediate area.
*
blade runner?!
yuuuuuup.
that's how you cap off a freaky-diki friday,
for sure, kids.
replicant retirement.
that's all there is;
never quiet, never soft.....
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