doing things.

grilled.
mmm-hmmm.
balsamic barbecue broccoli blops, 'lickers.
chipotle-sweet molasses tempeh hunks,
herb-simmered brown rice w/ kale and chard,
white onion scallion sets,
and flame-kissed bruschetta on sesame toast.
(that's bun-seed bread, ninjas-)
yum4tum.
we got those veggie jauns courtesy of cyle and casey's garden.
yep.
our peoples supply us with essentials,
and we, in turn, supply them with super-fancy unnecessaries.
that's some Folk Life give and take, for sure.
seems one-sided, you say?
yes,
but one-sided in OUR favor.
that's the key.
***********
d'y'all ever do push-ups?
oh man,
they're awful.
it's like pushing your luck,
or an elderly person,
except not as good.
it's all blood rushing to your face, and feelings of epic embarrassment.
and of course, a lot of pushing.
...up.
it's like proving to yourself that you really ARE lame.
and that you aren't very strong.
yeah.
now,
let's all act surprised that my stretch armstrong spindles aren't bulging out,
or that i'm not exactly rockin' the glistening washer-board ripplers.
i'm basically a geriatric zoo ape, with only slightly less hair.
try not to soak through those shorts, ladies,
i'm still spoken for...
c'mon.
but for real,
i couldn't care much less about corded-up flexing pop-outties.
at all.
but i would like to be able to smash a little bit more stuff,
and to do it a little bit quicker.
if this conditioning keeps up-
one day soonish,
i'll be able to swing a mutha-b!tchin' axe
like a treasure-raiding naked norseman:
severely severin' several sorts of sh!t.
part wampa, part viking, all hard-style.
all the time, even.
wreaking wreckage, my ninjas.
it's good for you (like vitamins)
***********
berserker barbarian battle-beasts.
still and all.
there's no moon powers to blame today,
there's no raging hot fire,
no furious lightning storms,
or any tooth-handed natural event.
only just plain ol' not giving a F*...
that's barbarian sh!t, duders.
on the really real.
a day off.
perfect weather.
a birthday shopping agenda.
and not much else.
y'know what'd be pretty fresh?
more guns.
that's most often the case, too.
i think that in honor of the excellent independence magic,
i may need to treat myself to an un-birthday present.
a large caliber, high-capacity, fire-spitting hand-cannon.
generally,
americanism is for suckers,
but when it comes to amendment two?
america is for unsuckling, sap-smashing super-hottness;
never quiet, never soft.....