my clients are better.

duders,
i know you think your peoples are dope.
and just maybe that's even a true story.
however,
really-real woodsly goodfellows inspire devotion from
even their merest of acquaintances.
that's a thing, neighbors.
it's not just my peoples that activate the nutrients.
check the flippin' teleport:

yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup.
a ZERO HEAVY serf-type medieval hand-knit skullcap,
with ear protecting futuristic dipline, too-
and it's for my F*ing face,
or at least my head.
like i said a second ago-
it isn't just peoples, y'all.
even my clients know how to get EXPERT, too.
pre-tattbomb activation, to eleven.
my new homegirl krystal had an appointment today.
she came bearing gifts of hottness.
lucky me.
and don't act like that big mouthful of sharky gluttony,
and that heroic chin-shrubbery don't deserve special
attention, either.
word up.
i need all the added warmth i can get ahold of.
it's numbingly, achingly, painfully cold out,
and we're huddled by the cast-iron flamethrower,
building up our bodyheat
for a long, lonely, cold, hard night.
***********
long weekend waterbabies are all up in force.
one hundred percent A*hole explosive 'tardation,
omnidirectional, live and direct from points unknown
funneled unfiltered to the epicenter of excellence
with only one known purpose-
...to totally mutha-b!tchin' ruin the goodness
with their weak-sauce suckhole ski vacation 'holery.
awwwwwwwwwww, man.
clogged up and bogged down and fully packed.
that's how it is,
that's what's going on.
everyone who is not us sucks,
and that's all the news from the Fortress;
never quiet, never soft.....