from my number one main man,
purchased via internet from whistler, b.c. canada,
and sent factory direct from beautiful san francisco,
and it's legendary chinatown...
that's exactly what i said, too.a wok.
and not just any old wok,
but a super-sexy carbon steel great big luxury model,
with a whole bowlful of little scooplers and sh!t.
there's racks, and steamers, and some weird round crown thing.
and those really big choppy sticks, too.
what can i say?
the cucch knows about treats.
that's how he knew to send me the deluxe turbo-dope ones.
i get to season it tonight,
with salt and high flames.
that's practically some biblical-smiting-type business.
only,
i don't know where the apostles or whoever
would've seen fit to feature woks in the bible.
they should've, probably-
i know i'd be more likely to care about that kind of stuff
if there was the promise of eternal stir-fry, y'heard?
or wontons, ya'll. so good.
wok the path of righteousness and all that noise.
...anyway,
i'm gonna activate the hottness of this big action later;
with salt and fire,
and maybe even that weird bamboo sex-toy brush, too.
i can't believe i didn't have one of these weird roundies in my house.
apparently, i was F*ing up all this time.
like i may have been an ignorant A-hole, even.
i'm just sayin',
cucchie was positively scandalized that i've not owned a wok.
it's an all-purpose kitchen implement, it turns out.
frying, stir-, deep-, and pan-, are all possible.
word up.
what about boiling?
yep.
steaming?
of course.
can you say braising?
no, not blazing with a wok-inspired accent.
but the wok can do it.
and saute', and smoke sh!t, and pop on some popplecorn.
it says so on my 'personal wok set instructions', ninjas.
so it must be true.
also,
it says it will just get blacker and better with use.
that's so dope i can't even handle it.
it's like sweeter berries an' that.
it's like chuck d, son.
thanks, buddy,
for being generous and thoughtful and considerate,
and for a terrific treats delivery.
treats, during a material fast?
that's a little something called perfect timing.
so good.
did i mention it came with a back scratcher?
yeah. it did.
why?
because wokshop.com is always reachable!
i swear it says so on the scritch-claw.
it's extendable, duders.
i'm glad i read that,
because i didn't immediately recognize it's infinite nature,
and i may have tried to cook with it, had i not.
***********
not spending money has the arthur-making bug kicking on.
i've got some ideas.
some Folk Life funtime, noise-making ones.
how about a mobile, bicycle-based one-man band?
with a little propane cookstove,
y'know,
for the wok.
anything is possible,
no matter how implausible.
i've got a wok,
if that isn't proof,
then you're going to have to talk to my man, yan.
because it's true, he can cook.
recognize;
never quiet, never soft.....
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