come ON.

some people think it's funny,
but it's cold and wet and runny.
sky-arrhea.
takin' a sort of hard-style sh!t.
right on my whole life:
no foolin', huh?

real-time real life documentation.

this is happening.

and it sucks the hardest and the fullest ones.

winter decided to actually show up for the party,

a little too much, and waaaaay too late.

just in case you missed it (& i didn't).

the first green is gold,

and then the second green is, y'know, green,

but apparently, this is the third green shade of nature:

white.

so stupid.

in fact, this weather is positively gaytarded,

and not in a good way, either.

i am displeased, my ninjas.

and i am a little bit cold, too.

that's the truth.

if i didn't know better,

i'd swear ma nature is tryin' to be a real s.w.b.

ohhhhh, sh!t.

i'm just kidding, mama naytch.

but seriously,

you could ease up on the sucktacular sauce any time now.

***********

what's better than bad weather?

that's an easy one to answer;

...everything!

could i be more specific?

sure:

harvest skye and maple st*r are here!

big thanks go out and about to our good buddy elsah

for driving jess' cute A*biscuits all over the F*n' place

and especially for delivering my shivering seedlings

up to the northern frostline...

naturally,

what with it being april and all,

snowsuits were NOT packed.

vacation, day one.

BOOOOOO!

super mario on the wii anyone?

***********

i've got nine tattoos to do today,

if anybody even shows up.

it's a well-recorded fact, y'all:

old people and women from massachussetts

aren't cognitively capable of navigating

through the (single) byway, or the three back roads

of the woodsly goodness in any kind of road conditions,

let alone snowy, blowy, savage, stormswept, ravaging rage.

standstills are to be anticipated.

no-shows and cancellations as well.

nine tattoos.

in six hours?

that's vacation weekend business, kids.

i do the work,

i pull my weight,

i tote my share of the burden;

no finicky fragile sensibilities here.

extra-crappy? maybe.

emotionally under-rewarding? probably.

still my job? definitely.

you want zaps, you get zaps.

it's all the same sh!t.

that's huckabees, son-

everything you could ever want or need,

you already have and are,

everything is the same, even when it's different.

everything is the blanket, remember?

never quiet, never soft.....