barbarian burgers.

black bean remix?
sure.
duders,
it's just that i loooove eating food.
like,
so much.
like,
i'm definitely possessed by spirit and infinite nature
of a great big sloppy disgusting fat person.
no question.
i just want to fit all of the treats into my bellyhole,
every second of every minute of every hour of every day.
forever.
so,
when it's dinnertime,
it's also time to get busy making sure i gorge myself.
i'll eat a lot all by my lonely,
but,
when i have company over to span time and break bread?
yeah!
then,
it's also time to activate the fancy business.
i want to be impressive a little teeny tiny giant amount all the time.
that's a thing.
good news, though, neighbors-
after my last couple of days of sandwiches,
i had some dough hanging out in the refrigerator.
it was just waiting to get pan-fried into a couple of flatbreads.
i'm reppin' that puffy pancake jauns pretty hard lately.
why?
because they're F*ing expert.
jeez.
what are you?
an A*-hole.
don't be dumb.
anyway....
herbs and spices,
like parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme?
all simon says to get all garfunkle with it.
and marjoram?
and yellow onion,
and a nootch crust.
ok.
okay, okay.
actually,
the nootch crust came about because my dinner companion
reminded me how necessary nootch is,
and i had actually forgotten it when i was mixing up all my bits.
ugh.
it happens, kids.
i'm not perfect by any means.
but my mistake became our delight,
at her suggestion.
check the teleport:

yuuuuuuuuup.
green and leafy chopped and braised kale,
a slippery slap of yellow onions,
sprouts,
and custom activated smoky paprika and chipotle ho' sauce dressing!
yeah.
i love the idea of one fat folded fresh sandwich,
but with two circles of protein-rich bean magic all up in it.
i mean,
it's like fitting in double the regular amount,
but AS the regular amount.
smart.
***********
also,
sometimes,
you don't have time to wait for natural orderly progression.
y'know?
yeah.
i know you do.
the thing of it is-
i already know that nature is always gonna win.
i mean, rules is rules.
so,
if it follows that there will be victory for all of the
secret universal infinity and all that.....
how do i get it to help me win, too?
c'mon.
that's easy.
just embrace the worst and make it the best.
expert.
for instance,
these icy terrible slush heaps everywhere?
they're slippery, and grainy, and just full of arctic temperature sh!t.
...and that's good news.
hmmm?
no, really-
i mean it.
just check the teleport:

that's it!
friends,
i pressed and packed it around a pot of
piping, steaming, scalding hot hot hot raspberry compote.
a whole mess of outdoorsy wintertime crappiness
becomes heat-dissipation-activated quick-cooling happiness.
thanks, terrible weather,
for speeding up the fruit filling feature of my latest tuesday tarts.
-
when life hands me lemons,
i zest 'em up, and squeeze 'em out,
and drizzle all that citrus into my red razzes.
it helps;
never quiet, never soft.....