bannocks?

bannocks?
what the F* are bannocks?
they're scottish oat cakes.
salty, dry, savory oatmeal flatties for your face.
got it?
they're bannocks
and they're expert, definitely.
now,
i've got a real-deal werewolfen sweet tooth, for certain.
i mean it,
i'm so much more likely to terrorize some sugary somethin'
than any herbed-up salt-shakered stuffs.
and that's no joke.
but,
when it's as weak-sauce as this winter weather is,
working itself into every drafty crease and crack inside
the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress?
sometimes you've gotta get activated on those hearty hardy jauns.
y'know?
yep.
so i got a little fast and loose with the traditions,
and i added vegan sour cream,
and a bit more butterishness,
and a scoople of brown sugar,
and dried cherries,
and chopped pecans,
and raw demerara sugary sprankles,
in addition to the wholemeal magic and intact rolled oats.
wordimus prime, neighbors-
check the at-home-scone-activational-type teleport:

stacks of 'em, for your F*ing frozen faces!!
they're salty, sure,
with precisely enough sweet on top to hit your palette just right,
and dissolve on your tongue,
and make your whole big fat shark-gluttonous self
freak right out with delight.
huh?
yeah.
delight.
that's right.
they're damned good, duders.
delightful, even.
in the scottish kitchen,
scones are bannocks and bannocks are scones,
but over here, in the woodsly goodness?
these jammie-jams are scones that borrow from bannocks heavily.
i'm not from scotland, after all.
that's all really a whole lot of whatever, wherever, whenever.
right now, in my house,
they do go down so smooth with a hot fresh cuppa, tho.
mmmmmmmm.
breakfast gets it IN over here.
we doo-doo that oaty fruity nutty sweet and salty all-at-once-type sh!t.
why?
because expert recognize expert, dummy.
duh.
this is how i stay warm.
stick-to-my-ribs biz,
in copious quantities,
all morning long.
that's it;
never quiet, never soft.....