what's more interesting is that there's not that much left over.
actually, i'm not sure of that's interesting or disgusting, or both.
why did i do that?
because i DO that.
y'wanna see all the stuff?
ok.
DUMPS ON YOUR FACE.
holy sweet fat pants, man.
that's the appetizer?????
damn.
scallion and toasted sesame dumpling wraps from scratch?
yes.
that's molto flavor on the OUTside.
and on the inside, there's cabbage, carrot, garlic, onion, and celery,
steamed together with sesame oil,
and tamari, and rice wine vinegar, and raw grated skin-on organic ginger,
and black pepper,
and crushed dried chinese chili flakes,
and a little baby bit of sichuan peppercorn to numberwang your skull.
-
i tried the lacey flour/water steam technique.
do you know it?
you mix a little flour and water, and pour it over the dumps
while they're sizzling in a very hot pan and the steamy dream creates
dried flour lace crepe crap around the edges, allegedly.
i may not have been as devoted to the whole thing,
since i was also making all the other other stuff, as well.
but the sauce was expert, even if the lace was lacking.
red chili, sichuan pepper, black pepper, rice vinegar, tamari, sesame oil,
fresh ginger, fresh raw garlic, toasted sesame seeds, and scallion.
-
now, i made a few classics, too-
like these:
MASH HASH!
smoked paprika, brown sugar, tempeh bacon bits, caramelized buttery shallots,
all over mashed sweet potatoes- boiled with onion and garlic btw,
for added excellence, prior to a GPOP and buttery smooshfest, y'know?
yeah, you know.
and i made this:
ROAST BUTTERNUT SQUASH,
with cinnamon, nutmeg and maple syrup, plus olive oil,
and dried cranberries,
and agave glazed pecans and pepitas.
mmmmhmmmm.
and i had to make this:
roasted rainbow root veg.
parsnips, rainbow carrot, red, blue, and white baby potatoes,
sweet potato, red pearl onions, a few brussies and a bit of butternut,
and butter, plus a toss-around of olive oil and salt, pepper, and GPOP.
it's a classic.
speaking of, what's thanksgiving without mashed potatoes?
check it:
FRIED GARLIC sprankle MASHERS!
boiled skin-on jauns, with onion and garlic,
mashed with butter (vegan obvi)
and fried garlic,
and mushroom umami powder (shoutouts trader joe),
and GPOP,
and non-dairy s'milk.
these had more flavor than all previous taters in my own personal recorded history.
this is the new way.
decreed.
...
and that patented way-better-than-your-dumb-flavored cranberry sauce.
real talk.
vanilla, cider, syrup, brown sugar,
plus a inch of salt and a squeeze of lemon,
and suddenly, your slow-cooked burst berries are the best,
instead of an orange and clove bummer.
...
and this year, i added a generic vegan treat.
CRISPY CURRIED TOFU,
with spinach and mushrooms.
yeah.
i baked batons of exxxtra-firm tofu,
coated in a combo of curry powder cornstarch, cayenne, GPOP, salt, pepper,
chick pea flour, and extra cumin and coriander-
tossed those breaded sticks in oil, and baked them until the skins were crisp.
then i sauteed some slightly salted mushrooms, wilted a little spinach,
added a few shredded cilantro stems and a couple of pomegranate arils,
and called it a day.-
that's a lot of food for one man, man.
i don't understand what you don't understand, though.
i have too many feelings, and i usually eat them.
-
how about this:
BRUSSELS SIMMONS!
sesame and soy glazed steamed and seared sprouts,
with lemon and pomegranate.
how creamy are the leaves on these guys?
VERY.
i steamed them in hot sesame oil and a splash of vegetable stock,
brough 'em up to a high heat blast again, cut sides down,
and glazed them with soy sauce.
then i added the arils, the lemon,
and CRUSHED WASABI PEAS.
worrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrd.
that's how you turn the spranks up to eleven, boi.
...
somehow,
i still managed not to take a picture of everything.
i also had pie, cookies, and apple crOmble.
also, the stuffy dressing, or the dressy stuffing, or whatever.
AND some incredible from-scratch gravy.
a LOT of that.
AND garlic'd collard greens, too.
i love those.
*
this is my big vegan annoying A*-hole flex, guys.
sexxxy food, colorful food, fancy food, good F*ing food.
food is my love letter to the world,
and my suicide note to my loved ones.
c'mon.
that'd be the dedication in my cookbook, i think.
this is about me showing off all my cooking skills.
the rest is a total mess.
don't be fooled-
P.M.A. keeps me going,
but real life is a hard negative this season.
i won't miss NOvember.
i hate it always and forever.
however,
tomorrow is the first, and a sunday.
that means that however unprepared i am for it,
rules is rules,
and it's sandwich week.
eight days and eight sandwiches where i do the damned thing,
all whilst wondering what everybody wants for XI-mas.
time is very literally running out,
and i have no idea what to do for most of my people.
i got started on the small ones,
and that was halfway easy.
everything i like, i know the boy will, too.
the rest are a mystery.
and i don't exactly have BMW money these days-
in fact,
i heard a five letter acronym for what kind of man i am, financially-
a HENRY-
that's a high-earner, not rich yet.
ugh.
meanwhile, i'm wondering what kind of bread to make,
and i feel like i'm buried alive about all of it.
shoutouts to november ending.
shoutouts to diminished dedication to this blog.
shoutouts to sandwiches.
shoutouts to a new era.......of loneliness.
shoutouts to carl from aqua teen hunger force for looking like my dad,
and giving me that quote;
never quiet, never soft.....
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