nobody leaves with the title.

so,
i totally ran out of fuel oil for the furnace
here at the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress.
uh-huh.
i know.
that IS what poor people do.
gross.
the worst part?
i had just finished bragging about what a baller-A*
doodietwinkling XI-mas i'd made happen for my kids-
detailed descriptions of the delightful dopeness
that is activated expert gift-giving one minute,
and then i'm waking up to shivering timbers,
and visibly frosty breath steam indoors the next one...
yikes.
huh?
yeah, neighbors,
that's some weak sauce for sure.
and it was sunday morning,
which means that the oil man F*s you in the A* a little bit,
to the tune of an extra $100.
...and not for nothin', y'all,
but i don't take kindly to an upcharge for A* F*ing.
real talk.
so,
 we waited until yesterday for the delivery.

yuuuuuuuuup.

camped in front of the stove, 

keeping it cranked up to eleven,

whilst the extra fat foot of flippin' snow serendipitously

insulated the hallowed shallow hollow halls and walls around here.

it's not the money, y'know?

it's the principle.

so we kept it really real, 

like forest dwelling winter druids,

and used hot fire and infinite nature and cast iron to 

cast a magic spell of turbo-hottness for our faces.

that's Folk Life rural woodsly goodness sh!t for sure.
mmmhmmm.
and then we got a big fattie-boombattie filled-to-the-brim
tank of oil delivered yesterday.
all set, right?
c'mon.
what are you?
an A-hole?
don't be dumb.
the silty, sooty, sh!tty dregs at the bottom of the barrel
clogged the lines and gummed the works,
and wrecked the workings inside the hotbox.
awwwwwwwww, man!
ugh.
the furnace took a cold crap after a last-gasp gulp of sludge.
that's more like it, really, right?
a complication borne on a barge bitter b!tchbaggery.
yeah.
so,
that meant coming home late to an even more frigid manse.
ouch.
the fire went out while we were out,
and it takes a minute to reheat the cavernous cathedral i call home.
and with the mercury dipping low low low into the negatives,
it got a little hard to stay positive.
the kids had a sleepover at jess's house.
hmm?
yes, kids-
that's ex-wife step-off  stepmom-type sh!t-
but it surely beats having them frost bitten and twice-shy
before they go back home to connecticut.
what about me?
what about me?
i kept the home fires lit,
to keep the pipes unfrozen,
and waited until today to have the lines set right.
oh, it's alright.
i'm a MAN, remember?
that's real.
so this morning has been about baking treats,
to keep the oven going,
to keep the kitchen temperate,
and the treats well-stocked for tonight...
...and for waiting for the furnace repair man to make moves.
i guess they were gonna F* my A* for all that extra loot,
one way or another,
or so it seems.
that figures.
anyway,
there's always one last pain-in-the-heinie hitch,
every time.
it's the nature of infinite nature.
if it ends,
it ends at an all-time-low.
because without those bitter bits,
how would we know what was sweet instead of sour?
yup.
hard styles get harder when they're frozen.
long nights get longer when you're on hot fire duty.
and all of it is all really happening.
that's the whole point.
hopefully it's all sorted out, now.
there's hot air blowing out of every available vent,
the stove is pumping auxiliary BTU's too,
and slowly, ever so slowly, it's getting less arctic,
and a little bit more manageable.
nobody leaves with the title, friends.
rules is rules;
never quiet, never soft.....