RABBIT?!?! RABBITRABBIT!!!!!

i said it.
i did.
i almost didn't.
but the first words that escaped my face were the right ones,
in echoing sequence, out into the aether of eternity,
from the warmth of my comforting covers and comforter,
in order to cultivate coincidence correctly,
and be the catalyst for effective cause-and-effect contextual continuity.
yup.
today is the first.
and there's some serious semi-subliminal collateral calamity connected to today,
so there's NO way i'm not saying the thing i say to generate good fortunes
and favoritism from the future.
uh-huh.
you know the drill,
and you know the lyrics.
out loud, and proud, we speak the syllables, and reap the superstitious rewards:
rabbit! rabbit!
that's a thing,
and it really happened once again.
also,
we traveled back in time.
i can't say i'm thrilled about an extra hour of today, really,
but,
i can say that waking up at 4 a.m. didn't seem as extreme, since it felt like 5.
hahaha.
early birds and worms turning tunnels into toilets.
that's what happens at 4 a.m.
that,
and crabby biting my lip off.
that sharkbite bullet attack is why i almost didn't say the magical words,
and came very close to using caustic expletives instead.
luckily,
i remembered the time and place i was in and at,
and averted the curses in favor of the summoning of some
spellcrafted sorcerous source material.
the thing of it is,
even after a long day of eye makeup and tight fitting tights and t-shirts,
i still had to get a head start on the big action for today.
yeah.
that's correct.
today is the day,
and we start every first with treats.
rules is rules,
and in this instance,
the rules collided and coincided with two expert events at the same time.
y'know what that means?
y'know what time it is?
it's time to check the teleport, and then i'll tell you what's poppin':

WOOOOOOOOO!!!
whoopie pies?!
wooo pie-pies!!!
expert!
exxxtra cocoa in the cake, and that tight rim of outer sticky sweet hottness,
plus peanut buttery creamchee' supersoft whippy drippy frosting filling in the centers?
high calories and deep indulgence are tthe name of the game, neighbors.
reeal talk.
and i went ahead and triple-tracked the edges with elite sprankles.
you know why?
because too much is the right amount, that's why.
oh, right-
but do you know why it's whoopie time?
because fillin' in the blanks between breadlike biscuits and buns
is what we're all all about for the next eight days in a row.
remember?
c'mon.
what happens when the month starts on a sunday, kids?
uh-huh.
that's riii-iiiight.
it's mutha-'ucking boomfire barbarian business up in the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress-
welcome back to sandwich week.
....word the F* up,
and if you weren't ready for it,
well,
you'd better be getting ready,
because sandwich week is the truth between two slices of bread.
that's no joke.
this isn't a game, duders.
it's a sunovab!tchin' rule.
***********
today is the day,
all saints day, even.
and that's some dia de los muertos type jauns, in full effect.
...i like it,
i'm off to work too damned early for my own good this morning,
but i'll be back at it,
and ready to butter my buns by tonight.
it's all really happening, and that is the whole entire point;
never quiet, never soft.....