i am legend.

neighbors,
it was a thor's day thunder and lightning explosion of turbo-charged super-hottness
here in the crowded vale of woodsly goodsly vacation town time.
...uh-huh.
for realsies.
the activation levels were at an all-time high,
and my peoples came out to participate in the expert events of the day.
overall overlaps and coincidental occurrences all became the standard priorities
for any and all individuals trying to be a part of what was going on.
amanda, and elsah, and little bitty baby van, and the cucch,
and my thursday coworkers,
and obviously even my own damn self,
were all equally invested in making sure harvest and maple had a great day.
we doo-doo that viking village of luxurious longhouses and lavish longship-type
raging virtuous evaluating.
y'know?
we just be dope, and we never F* right off....
but seriously,
we got it together and we all joined forces to level-up that fresh-to-death jauns.
so,
after a long-A* day of doing a bunch of busywork and ballout berserker sh!t,
it was time to take the whole dang shooting match up another notch.
yuuuuuuuup.
it's been too long, my ninjas, and i felt i owed it to my helpful homies and my
heroic homegirls, too.
that's right.
the number one coveted creation from the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress,
in full F*ing effect fresh from out of the oven.
you know it, you love it, you wish you had it in your mouth right now;
the legendary loaf of stuffed-up fat F*ing flavorful florets and fury!
check the teleport, and start drooling:

broccoli bread, b!tches,
oh, how i missed those deep dirty diapers of dopeness.
who gets one?
c'mon,
what am i?
an A*-hole.
i repped the homemade dough in a big ol' double-barbarian batch,
and made a stromboli for every-flippin'-body, duders.
there were actually four of 'em.
me and my heterolifemate each ate one whole one.
shark-gluttony was made for precisely this.
...and with that many loaves of loveliness,
everybody got the butt of the bread,
and some of us got two.
(which is definitely my thing, anyway)
oft-coveted by ALL the other other ones;
and once sampled?
you know it-
it's fondly remembered and constantly craved by those very lucky precious few
who've had the good luck and better timing to be here and munch up a slice or five.
i made a lot, because too much is the right amount.
check the so-many-loaves-you-thought-jesus-came-over teleport:

yeah.
we doo-doo that freaky sh!t, y'all.
we have to.
why?
what do you mean why?
because we always go to eleven.
...duh.

the vidalia got sauteed to a golden translucence,
the broccoli got semi-steamed and super-seared in the oily, oniony,
G.P.O.P.ped  nootch-blasted cast iron,
and all while the yeasty beasts swelled their farts up inside the flour to raise the roof.
and what a dough, yo.
we got semolina in there, and extra gluten to make it crusty and stretchy,
and a little sugar to sweeten the deal and feed the active dry microscopics,
and olive oil to keep it on that fancy italian style,
and salt, because we aren't stupid.
*
it was a long time coming,
and we all got what we needed.
traditions are only as good as the tradition-keepers.
sure,
i could make this hot and heavy log of gooey green-filled daiya-cheesy jauns
any old time whenever i felt like it,
but i don't.
me and my little ones deserve our own special things.
and this is one of them.
you've gotta be here to share in it.
and you've gotta be a part of it to be party to it.
it's our time together with our own important events, no matter how simple,
no matter how everyday they culd become if we let them,
that make all the minutes we span together matter more.
i know it, they know it, and that's exactly what's so damn good about it.
we've got an understanding, me and mine-
we mark occasions with ceremony and sentiment,
and create the rules that suit our situations and determine the direction we head in.
plus,
if it happened all the time,
it'd just be a thing, and not our special thing.
this is what i do,
and this is how i do it;
never quiet, never soft.....