i've got problems.
i mean it.
for instance,
what the F* am i going to do with all these cupcakes?
seriously, neighbors,
i'm waist deep in baked treats,
and there's a snowstorm keeping all my hungry helpers away.
awwwwww, man!
luckily they hold onto that soft and spongy moist deliciousness forever.
still,
hanging out and sharing treats would've been nice.
...i made 'em extra expert too.
check the peanut-buttery teleport:
snow day hottness for cold weather and empty houses/bellyholes.
they're pretty F*ing good.
no jokes.
those chocolaty cakes are slathered in some serious peanutty frosting magic,
and those sprankles are no slouches either.
of course,
i didn't stop there, though, did i?
no way.
i'm no lazy babypants A*-hole, y'all.
there's peanut butter chocolate fudge in the centers!
yuuuuuuuup.
teleport to the inside of the cups:
they're just right.
because they're ridiculously over-the-top,
and that's the way we like it, isn't it kids?
uh-huh.
you need one.
you really do.
***********
orchids?
yeah.
i got some big babies to grace my room.
that's right, kids-
i'm filling the place with life.
teleport:
they're pretty sexy,
and once i get them into some hot new pots,
they'll be the happiest space-alien starship trooper flowers ever.
i'm slowly trying to replace what was taken away.
i didn't exactly lose any of it,
insofar as i kinda have a general idea of where it all is now located.
but,
i want that new sh!t that i'm picking out for my own dang self, y'heard?
i'm gaining autocratic autonomy for this Folk Life i'm living.
and without olive the dog to anchor me in obligations?
you guessed it...
.....it's completely flippin' great.
real talk-
i think i'm better off without her.
weird.
the more i cede away from the Fortress,
the more time and space i have for whatever comes next.
i'm ready, my ninjas;
never quiet, never soft.....
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