sandwiches are the answer.

duders,
after a long day of tattooing and entertaining,
cracking jokes at others' expense,
upping the ante on cover-ups and
upping the ante on being revealing,
there's just one thing i'm thinking about when i walk
into the waiting arms of my heroic homestead in the hills.
uh-huh.
when i'm all up in the warm woodsly walls of
the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress, all i ever really want
is to put a sandwich in my hands, and shove it into my mouth.
in fact,
i needed a gob-stoppin' emergency brake for my motor-mouth yesterday,
and the only way it was gonna happen was if i got busy making moves,
and casting my cajun-style spell over some bread and stuff.
believe it.
neighbors,
it's sandwich week.
that's the best news anybody ever gets, really.
i did some of the fastest talking of my life, run-ons running away at the lips,
and slippin' past the tongue and teeth that might've mediated the content
of my discontented diatribes from start to finish yesterday.
yikes.
i knew a tasty piece of dinnertime decompression was what i needed,
and that's exxxactly what i got poppin'.
check the payday-po'boy-type teleport:

kaBOOMfire!!
cajun-seasoned tempura-battered deep fried king oyster mushrooms.
yup.
that's the fancy business.
i figured the secret universal plan was insisitent on this sandwich.
no, really.
my number one aide-de-camp, the cucch, suggested oyster mushroom po' boys,
and my client came in with a fresh-picked bag of 'em from a mushroom farm
the same mutha-flippin' day!
cultivated coincidences should not be ignored,
and since i think that's an unwritten rule....
...well, rules IS rules....
so i battered 'em up, in an icy club soda fizzed and smoky paprika'd mix.
y'ever seen a king oyster mushroom?
they are pretty dope, all on their own, and that's before they get assigned
by my deep fryer to accurately masquerade as shrimp, even.
teleport:

that's that expert sh!t, for sure.
but,
why is it a payday po'boy?
well, for starters, those 'shrooms ain't no joke.
also,
i used a fancy luxury salad blend for the crawnchy water on top.
shredded green and red cabbage, red onions and red radishes?
spicy, crawnchy, farty, and fresh!
plus, roma tomato slices,
and the big crankle-sliced pickle stackers.
on a fresh, perfect french roll, too?
c'mon.
that's no for broke-A* b!tches.
that's the hottness right there.
get another 'nother look, then i'll tell you all about that remoulade.
teleport:

now,
the remoulade is what took it to eleven, kids.
vegenaise,
chipotle ho' sauce,
smoked paprika,
cayenne,
scallions,
g.p.o.p.,
whole-grain dijon, and horseradish mustards,
and black pepper for miles.
guys,
i hope you know i'm not playin' around when i tell you that this
mother-F*er right here is the TRUTH.
sandwich week brings out all the really realness that ever there was
in the Folk Life active participatory lifestyle.
it's warrior poetry with knives and forks;
it's total wartime collateral devastation,
but with the clean-up only needing soap and water;
it's a contest of wills, pitting creativity against gluttony,
with waistline wastelands as the battlegrounds;
and most of all,
it's ALL really happening,
and that's the whole point;
never quiet, never soft......