abominable.

really?
some kind of crushing wintry fury?
it's like the old man winter overslept,
and when he woke up,
he flipped the F* out about running late,
and is more than making up for lost time,
balls-out, full-blown basting the earth in abominable blizzard wizardry.
y'know what that means;
shovel time.
shoveling isn't any more fun,
or any cooler, just because you're a homeowner.
it may even suck a little bit more.
ninety feet of driveway?
daaaaaamn,
that sh!t was the hottness in the summertime.
it has cooled considerably in the ensuing months.
my snowpantsed wifey helped with snow-removal.
but,
it kept snowing despite her insistence that it should probably quit doing that.
so, phone calls were made, ya'll.
and now we have a new plow guy.
because scoopling up some frozen water piles is for A-holes.
this plow guy had better be better than than bootyfaced buttblaster we had last year.
...or else.
and i mean 'or else, SO hard', even.
***********
there are next-to-no cars out and about.
there are even fewer people walking.
sleigh bells ringing or otherwise,
there isn't much wonderland flavor to be had in this dog-doo snowcone of a day.
it seems only right that i should head back out,
into the wild windswept wastes of woodsly wintertime,
and fight ice with fire.
the hottest of fires at that.
a little spit, some kindling, a semi-salubrious stink stick, and a pair of mittens.
barbarians love the winter.
that's the truth.
a good reason to wreak wreck on the world an' that.
snowfall muffles footfalls,
but the thunder gets brought to bear anyway;
never quiet, never soft.....