what am i?

an A-hole?
maybe.
i went to the XI-mas nightmare store yesterday,
and immediately got off-topic on my specific item quest.
i got some dumb stuff i don't need,
some stuff i'd forgotten i needed,
and forgot the stuff i went there for.
it's the flourescents and the muzak, ya'll.
they F* with my sh!t so hard.
the upshot is that i get to go back to the trenches again.
what's better than one nightmare?
two, obviously.

speaking of sagitarian pearl harbor echoes,
today is my father's berfday.
the guru of infinite wisdom and supreme intelligence turns 60.
sixty!
that dude is old.
like, yoda old, even.
man, it must suck to be that old.
but,
it's good to have an eyewitness with firsthand experience in the family.
y'know,
someone who was there, and can tell me the muddy details of woodstock,
and to bikery sh!t, and assorted burly barbarian stuff.
not to mention someone old enough to know what dinosaurs tasted like,
and how cool discovering electricity was an' all that historic stuff.
***********
he's sure to celebrate with a left-handed cigarette,
and a heinous hank of bloody bovine body bits.
dudes just do what they do an' that.
that's my man.
the dude.
my dad.
apples and trees and gravity and newton.
i don't give a fig, my ninjas;
never quiet, never soft.....