Thursday, November 1


corn and rice pasta sucks balls.
sorry, bro.
but, that's the truth.
it should be called rubber bummer bad-taste tubes.
how's that for honesty?
they're not ALL winners,
even if they're all vegan and well-intentioned and perfectly planed out in advance.
look at this mess, man:

the wheatless, meatless black bean sausages are expert as heck,
and the shaved fennel is pretty tight,
and rainbow blackened tomatoes are always invited to my table,
but that pasta?
dang, it was an unholy poop-crinkle flop, and i'm not impressed...
let's start with what's good:
arugula and radicchio.
slightly seared fennel and fried garlic sprankles.
and the sausages?
i tried a new thing, and it went a lil sumthin' like this:
in your choice of mashy-mash-maker (blender, mixer, food processor) puree:
1 cup black beans;
1/2 red onion;
2 cloves garlic;
1 T nootch;
1/2 tsp pink salt;
1/2 cup tomato.
add that to a pot with a T or two of olive oil,
and let it begin to cook down....
fennel, parsley, sage, rosemary, thyme, oregano, basil,
smoked paprika, liquid smoke, and a splash of gf soy sauce-
cook it until it's thick, and a little less bean-y than it starts out (taste it, duh)
turn off the heat, and add:
1 cup chick pea flour;
3 T oat flour;
black pepper, and salt, if necessary-
let that bind up, and form links by hand when it's cooler-
i rolled mine in organic on-GMO cornstarch,
and fried 'em to get a skin on the outsides, too.
i think that helped.
then, the next day, when it was serve-it-up time,
i just rolled 'em in a hot pan with a dab of oil,
and we were ready already.
sliced, seared, and totally awesome for my face!
that's good stuff.
too bad about that bam-bam pasta, though.
it looked so COOL.
that figures.
the stay ugly, stay dope mantra applies even more than the other one:
staying ugly and eating beautiful.....
i'll make more sausages, and we'll share better pasta when i do;

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