Saturday, April 21

NA-NA-NA-NAAN!!

indian food from scratch?
i don't usually take requests, but when i do- it's because i want the same thing.
ha.
does that even count?
i dunno.
but i DO know that homemade indian food is pretty flippin' expert.
no jokes.
and i made some serious new hottness for my face.
...yeah, i did.
check it:

BOOOOOOOMFIIIIIRE!!!
hahaha.
that's IT.
the rice has lime zest and juice in it.
that made it pretty F*ing special.
there's a fairly fiery onion chutney, too.
mmhmmm.
that's
3 T chopped onion;
1/4 tsp ea. hot paprika, cayenne, and black pepper;
1 tsp sriracha;
1/2 tsp olive oil;
1 T minced chili;
and a dash of pink salt.
spicy. sweet. and just what a bite of rice and bread needs to go to eleven.
spreaking of-
good bread makes better people,
and that's a fact even when it's quick bread, bruh.
real talk.
and that bread right there was exceptional in it's fluffy firmness.
i don't eff around with bread. it's too important to me.
here's how i did what i did when i did it, tho, for the record:
-
*
ILL NA'NAAN
-
in a smaller mixing bowl, combine:
1 cup flour;
dash of salt;
2 T vegan butter;
1/4 cup coconut yogurt;
1 T baking powder.
knead knead knead it up, and rest it, covered for ten minutes.
roll out four fat floppy circles, and pan fry 'em for a minute on each side-
i activated a little exxxtra, and melted a pat of butter in the same pan, post-fry,
and wiped each one into it for a lil baby bit of added buttery love.
that was a great idea if i do say so, and i do day so,
which helped keep 'em exxxtra-tasty when wrapped in foil until supper was ready.
smart.
*
guys,
the potato scene around here was unusually adorable.
yup.
mini itty-bitty pebble-sized potatoes, in a tricolor rainbow of skin-on new newness?
yes!
s'kyoooot!!
check the teleport:

WOW!
spicy, but not too spicy;
hearty, but not heavy;
thick af, but not overly starchy.
we doo-doo the nicey-nice, neighbors, and it pays off on the plate.
-
*
ALOO MATAR!
-
boil up two cups of mini potatoes, drain, rinse,
and pan-fry in a tablespoon of vegan butter.
set aside for now, and start up the gravy!
-
in a hot pan with 1 T vegan butter melted, saute:
1/4 finely minced sweet onion;
2 large cloves crushed garlic;
1 inch chunk of organic skin-on ginger, macerated;
add:
1/2 tsp cumin;
1/2 tsp mustard seed;
1/2 tsp ground coriander;
33 craxxx fresh black pepper;
1/2 tsp turmeric;
1/2 tsp hot paprika;
GPOP, cardamon, dried cilantro, to taste.
add a handful of whole baby grape tomatoes,
and sizzle up to release all the aromatic awesome of those spices.
next,
pour in 1 1/2 cups crushed tomatoes,
and simmer fifteen minutes on medium-low.
add minced jalapeno, cilantro, fresh crushed garlic, and a cup of frozen peas-
bring back up to a bubblin' temperature, add the potatoes, and let it marinate together
until you're ready to munch up.
TIGHT!
the tomatoes will burst with flavor.
the potatoes will melt in your mouth.
the sauce will leave a lasting positive impression on your psyche.
and the heat will stimulate you in ways you never dreamed of.
...and the peas will please you with protein and green.
i don't actually know if that last one is real, but i hope so.
*
...and then,
even after the cucumbers, and the coconut yogurt,
and the bread, and the lime-kissed rice all delivered all sorts of sexxxiness to the table-
the real heat came through with that cauliflower!
F* yes it did.
and there's a heckuva lotta spinach, and a bit o' crawnchy veg in it, too!
teleport:

...WOW...
so hot!
-
*
GOBI SAAG!!
-
in a medium sauce pot,
heat 1 T vegan butter, and saute:
1/2 diced sweet onion;
2 cloves crushed garlic;
1/2 chunk fresh skin-on organic ginger;
into that, toss and toast:
1/2 tsp ea. cumin, coriander seed, mustard seed, dried ginger, black pepper,
GPOP, & red pepper flakes;
add 1/4 tsp black pepper and cinnamon;
cayenne? yeah. turmeric? a whole LOT of that, for sure,.
and then right over all of that, add:
half a head of chopped cauliflower florets,
half a slivered jalapeno pepper,
and a couple tablespoons of water, and a lid....
-
it's steamy dream that you've just entered into, man.
no jokes.
when the cauli is softened, and yellow form the spice,
toss in two huge mitt-fisted handfuls of baby spinach,
and let it wilt right down to a wet heap.
stir it all to mix it up,
and toss in some jalapeno rings and fresh chopped tomato!!!
FUEGO, yo.
no jokes.
*
we terrorized a TON of tastiness.
we tuned up a mountain of rice.
we munched an acre of naan.
we swallowed a popeye'd parcel of spinach.
basically,
we over-ate and underrated our unadulterated plates of pure delicious expertism,
until we were stuffed past the possibility of romance.
awwwwww...
that's kinda how we get intimate these days-
wallowing in a trough of gluttonous goodness until we're incapacitated.
oooof.
***********
weekends for the next few months are sorta zero percent big fun.
damn.
in fact,
they're probably the least enjoyable span of tattoo time i have.
why?
because it's almost all out-of-staters,
taking up whole swaths of day-long doo-doo buttery vacation tattoos,
and eliminating the possibility of any lovely locals,
or even a couple of wonderful walk-up ideas for y'boi.
uh-huh.
well in advance, i've got saturday and sunday double-headers hovering over my head.
dudes, i KNOW-
i'm lucky to have the work.
i'm humbled by the patience these people display in making far-reaching appointments.
and being busy is better than being dead in the water.
now,
if only more of these folks were into the hot fire and lightning that i create myself,
and less all about the internet image searches,
we'd be cooking with the right spices.
more succulent sexxxiness please.
more weird ideas, please.
more skulls and flowers, please.
-
being grateful doesn't mean i can't aspire to greater things.
settling for good enough is never enough.
after all, that's what AMPERSAND TATTOO is all about-
BIGGER, BETTER, FASTER, MORE;
never quiet, never soft.....

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