Sunday, June 10


i will never ever ever stop eating pizza.
y'hear me?
there's nothing in this world i find nearly as rewarding
as a hot slice (or five) of homemade pizza, piping hot and fresh from out
of a raging roaring oven.
that's my simplest and greatest pleasure.
pizza is the TRUTH, neighbors, and i'm a truth-teller extraordinaire.
all the parts, all the components, all the constituent elements of a well-prepared pizza
work in harmonious unison to activate the greatest sense of well-being
that my tiny little brain can comprehend.
no, for real.
how can one food be such a triumph?
i'm sayin'- crust, sauce (or not!) chee' (or not) and stuff on top....
a crusty bread circle or rectangle or deep dish.
it doesn't matter- becausewhatever combination you employ, it's all so expert.
and that's why i love it so much.
regardless of how much you mess around with the formula,
it's still pizza, and it's still dope.
that's word.
i get into some real-time real-life really-real pizza scenarios,
and every time, i'm slightly surprised at how hard y'boi brings the noise-
that's no joke.
it's like i'm some sort of pizza genius.
ha. what? no. i'm not bragging.
it's just a thing. check the teleport:

hooray for F*ing pizza, bro.
do we have two kinds of vegan mozzarella on this bad b!tch?
weird dylan came through with a pair of tasty ones, and we used both.
y'know why?
uh-huh- because too much is the right amount.
so shoutouts to daiya shreds, minced even finer for maxxximum melt,
and to miyoko for being expensive and pretty flippin' good, too.
y'like those fresh mozz blops? so did we.
and that's homemade sauce, not just crushed tomatoes, buddy.
yeah. dylan brought the chee', and requested massive exxxtra sauce activation.
so i made some spicy fra daviolo jauns for his face,
and we used a holy heck-ton on there.
yeah, man, the sauce game was on FIRE-
1/4 cup minced onion;
3 T finely shredded carrot;
3 cloves crushed garlic;
1 T olive oil.
sauteed until slightly browned, and hooked up with:
1 T white wine vinegar;
2 T nootch;
1 tsp ea. GPOP;
black pepper, parsley, sage, rosemary, thyme, oregano, basil, red pepper flakes.
and 1 can crushed tomatoes,
all simmered and bubbled and steeped in it's own juicy flavor until the oven was hot,
and the dough was proofed, and the truth was right there waiting for me.
speaking of the dough:
stand mixer/doughhook/ low speed:
1 cup semolina;
1 1/2 cup bread flour;
1 tsp raw sugar;
1 tsp sea salt;
1 cup warm water;
3 T vegan butterish;
1 pkg superfast-actin' yeast.
beat it up forever. like 11 minutes, and let it rise for twentyish?
stretch it and stretch it, and arrange it on an oiled tray, and let it rise some more.
don't add sauce until the oven's hot, b.
otherwise you get the sogs, and those are for sh!t.
remember that, and you'll be a champ at pizza time, every time.
i know that life isn't all recipes and pizzas-
but if it WAS, though?
i'd be the most successful, and i might even be happy.
instead, i've just got all the best pizza, and that's something, anyway.
caramelized onion? check✔
semi-steamed seared broccoli?✔
homemade tempeh bacon bits? double check.✔✔
fried garlic sprankles?✔
c'mon. rule is rules after all.
and that tempeh bacon? all the way expert-
i had the marinade on deck, and the flavor profile turned waaay up-
ho'sauce, tamari, agave, GPOP, smoke hot paprika, black pepper, oil, and water,
to hydrate prior to caramelizing.
y'ever make that stuff?
you should-
it's pretty much an eyeballed concoction in a hot pan,
soaking into and onto all that fermented soybean sexxxiness.
i'd give it a shot if i were you.
i gave it a shot and i'm NOT you, so i'm probably telling the truth.
but, like, was that all there was?
no way.
there's no such thing as enough add-ons, guys.
we also had:
fresh basil, and fresh oregano, and arugula, and scallion sprankles?
F* yes.
MORE exxxtras equals MORE awesomeness,
and this one had about as much awesomeness as the pan could handle.
... i love pizza so so SO much.
every. single. time.
it never gets old.
it never lets me down.
and it never leaves me without also nourishing me.
i appreciate that.
busy businessman sh!t.
that's what i'm on about.
my last day off was in mid april.
that's no joke.
it feels like forever.
the thing is: what the eff else would i do?
my purpose is to be a singularly hard-working ever-present perpetual motion machine.
down time is NOT invited.
yard work is NOT invited.
vacation is NOT invited.
what i need is bigger, better, faster, louder, harder, and MORE.
when i get far enough on the productivity spectrum that i can slow down
and still be ahead of schedule?
that's when i'll start to find pursuits that don;t pummel me down a bit more every day.
y'ever see great expectations?
i'm just assuming you didn't read the book, because i mean, c'mon,.
wait- you did, and you DID?
wow. who even are you?
there's a goal-oriented validation fixation going on in that story
that i feel kindred kinship to deep in my bones.
worthiness is relative, but the sights i've set are lofty,
and the time i have to get it all in is limited.
it's all really happening, but i'm not sure i'm doing it right.
i need more minutes, i need more moments, i need to get better, be better,
and do MORE.
days off will have to wait until i've got that tangibly big fatty-boombattie gigante deluxxury
at my disposal.
good enough is not enough,
and there's nobody who's gonna give me what i want,
so i'm obliged to get after it all by my lonesome;
never quiet, never soft.....

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