Thursday, August 24

WAFFLEBROWNS!! HUSHPUPPERS!!

ohhhhhhh MAN!!
another 'nother big B?!
yes!
it's the most important meal of the day, reportedly.
therefore, when you know you're gonna be havin' a big day,
there's no good reason not to prepare for it.
yet again,
i went down to portsmouth,
and yet again,
crate and barrel did right by your boy!
mmhmm.
i love that place.
a warehousey factory outlet FULL of all the most luxurious
and undeniably top-tier sexxxiness,
from tablecloths and plates on through sofas and tables, chairs, etc. etc.
totally worth the trip down and back,
because all that hottness is NOT going to be found at some budget big box, bro.
real talk.
i'm on that upscale spectrum these days.
sure, sure, sure, the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress is falling apart,
literally and figuratively,
but that's just where i live, and people don't come here and see it.
i'm eagerly anticipating ALL the clients, though, at the new new,
so that's where i'm investing my efforts for the time being.
but, back to the humble haunted house on the hill where i dwell-
the test kitchen was bumpin' yesterday, neighbors.
yeah.
if only i'd known that TODAY was the day-
as in: national waffle day,
i might've waited.
then again, i needed nourishment for my journey an' that.
i guess it worked out the way it was supposed to.
today, i'm shorter on time than usual, even,
so big B isn't an option this morning.
yesterday, though, it was ON.
teleport:

HASHBROWN WAFFLE ACTIVATION!!!!
kaboom!
crispy and crunchy like a mofo.
like,
it snapped when you hit it with the fork,
but,
the insides were still soft!
expert.
a couple of  reaaaallllllly well-drained, squeezed, peeled, grated red potatoes (2),
and a generous interweaving of paper-thin-shaved red onion,
salted, peppered, and pressed into the iron.
flipped once along the alignment dents of the thing
so that both sides were equally cracklin' as the iron is only mostly level.
*
...and with that tofu scrambo on top of it?!
holy smokes!
exxxtra-firm 'fu, crumbled, and fried up with hemp hearts, nootch, GPOP, turmeric,
a dash of smoked paprika,
a little minced onion, (which i will say has improved the whole scene considerably)
olive oil, pink salt, black pepper, and hand-torn baby kale!
....delicious.
what could improve such fantastic flavors?
how about microgreens?
that'll work.
red onion sprankles?
for sure.
how about blackened baby sweet grape tomatoes, in red and orange?
c'mon,
what are you?
 an A*-hole?
rules is rules, neighbors.
fired tomatoes are ON the list.
*
pinto bean hash?!
is that a thing?
yes. that's a thing.
onion, red pepper, jalapeno pepper, poblano pepper, coriander, and beans,
fried up and caramelized,
with cilantro and green onion added in at the end for that freshness.
sliced jalapeno?
F* yes, bro.
i like the spice.
what the hey-now even are recipes for things like that?
i mean,
you put whatever amounts you want in an oiled pan, and sizzle them until they look right.
right?
i dunno, i just go with the feeling.
try it.
it's less stressful than you might think.
-
and speaking of catching feels-
i've some kind of a crush on THIS new new:

HUSH PUPPY PANNIECAKES?!?!
daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn.
spicy corn fritters for everybody from now on.
these little doggies are what i needed.
so hard.
and guys,
they're all sorts of awesome.
you want some?
you can have as many as you'd like,
if you do this:
-
*
HUSHLITTLEPUPS!!!
-
in a small mixing bowl,
whisk together:
2/3 cup flour;
1/2 cup cornmeal;
1/2 tsp salt;
1 1/2 tsp bakey powder;
1 tsp bakin' soda;
1 tsp each GPOP;
black pepper;
1 T melted vegan butter;
2 T finely chopped green onion;
2 tsp minced jalapeno;
-
add in 1/2 cup non-dairy 'milk;
+ 1 tsp cider vinegar;
+ 1 tsp oil, all whipped together and rested to make 'buttermilk'.
stir it up, let it rest,
and fry spoonfuls up in a hot buttery pan.
topped with another pat of earth balance spread,
and activated with MORE green onion and jalapeno?
word.
too much is the right amount.
that's real.
and a gigantic morning meal like this is the TRUTH.
i wasn't even hungry the whole res of the day.
that's pretty cool, considering i was in the car almost the whole time.
lucky lucky.
the ambitious optimism of a big day, with big plans, fueled by big B
is far greater than the actual elapsed time involved in making it happen.
the traveling in-between spaces and places is somehow eating up tracts of time
and making meals out of massive mountains of minutes.
i like efficiency, i like economy of motion,
and i seem to have lost my grasp on both.
maybe i just need some gloves.
wouldn't that be a nice easy fix?
we'll see how today goes, bros;
never quiet, never soft.....

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