Friday, March 9


chocolate oatmeal gluten-free breakfast blocks!!!
that's what we made in the morning,
and that's what powered my whole day into the stratosphere, neighbors!
with a little coconut, and a handful of crushed dried raspberries;
AND raspberry compote on top,
AAND chocolate chips,
AAAND powdered sugary sprankles-
all because too much is the right amount,
and taking it easy is the same thing as doing it wrong.
that's word.
y'wanna see what we got into?
you do?!
alright, then check this m-f'in' teleport:

well, yeah, man- that IS an AVO-F*ING-CADO.
that sh!t is expert,
and it's always invited to my mealtime exxxperience.
also, on some forever and ever-type truth telling, i have the crispiest homeboyfry game in town.
i do.
salted, peppered, and pre-roasted in a 400℉ oven until they're all goldenized,
before the caramelized onions and GPOP and smoked paprika all get tossed up
in a hot oily pan, bro.
i skipped the ho'sauce this time.
no. i'm not becoming a diaper baby- i just didn't want to ruin those chocolate oatbombs.
i was thinking ahead.
don't even try to get at me with some real eggs.
those come out of a cloaca, kid.
that's an all-purpose superbutthole.
read as: not. invited.
instead, you already know i'm on that exxxtra-firm 'fu,
and i got the hawaiian black salt in there,
plus some very strong turmeric, fresh black pepper, GPOP,
and nutritional yeast.
oh. and those fried-up, blackened sweet tomatoes, too.
if you measure things, i feel badly for you.
scrambo is a journey, buddy; one which you navigate by feel.
my feels are fully developed and so is my scramborghini exxxtravagance.
believe it.
the real star, of course, was that chocolate oatmeal.
they had a LOT of power packed in' em.
a cup of whole quicker oats;
3/4 cup freshly-crushed whole oat flour;
2 T sugar;
1/4 cup crushed unsweetened coconut;
4 tablespoons of cocoa;
3 T vegan butter;
3/4 tsp salt;
1 tsp vanilla;
1 tsp bakey soda;
1 1/2 tsp bakey powder;
(to be fair, i don't think these did jack sh!t to make this less dense)
2 T vegan protein powder (hemp-based);
2 T ground flax/chia seed meal;
4 T crushed freeze-dried raspberries (in retrospect i'd use double that);
2 cups unsweetened almond milk.
they cook quickly on a skillet, and they don't smoosh much out the sides when flipped.
all in all, they made for a burly barbarian lumberjack stack of filling cakey goodness.
you definitely know you just ate a lot when you get into 'em.
the chocolate chips and the powdered sugar were a nice touch.
a little exxxtra exxxtra, y'know?
sprankles are kind of our thing around here.
rules is rules.
the raspberry jammie-jam-up over the tops was also over-the-top in taste, too.
i had that on the literal back burner, as an afterthought,
and i can't say for sure what is in it,
other that to guarantee the presence of frozen raspberries.
also, powdered sugar, lemon juice, vanilla,
and organic non-GMO cornstarch slurried into the juice to thicken it up.
how much of each? that's a great question.
make it up, and make it your own.
i need a big breakfast every week.
just one, i'm not greedy.
but a big B is soulful soul food for my continued well being.
i mean it.
one wild and crazy beast-mode feast can increase my overall drive
and determination a thousandfold.
so, i s'pose i shouldn't miss out, with dividends like that, right?
heck yeah.
a feast of treats to nourish and replenish and invigorate my senses,
and infuse my old busted body with all the nutrients i can fit in there...
that's good stuff.
i think i'll continue to dive headlong into the mornings,
and share my creative side with my creative muse, too.
we have a good time when it's time to make a good time.
get it?
it's bonding an' that.
we do it, and it works, AND we get to munch it up.
that's a lot of winning.
doomsday late winter storm attack?
feet of snow, and nowhere to put it?
don't worry-
my terrible plow guy didn't even try to find a place for it.
i'm buried alive,
and i have to pay this dude for the privilege.
ain't that a lil b!tch?
i'm keeping my composure, but i have the urge to keep it molto real.
i'll probably just work my frustrations out with a shovel, instead.
that's productive at least;
never quiet, never soft.....

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