Wednesday, March 7


toasted oats!!!!
if you've not been privy to that as a thing-
here's your wake-up head's-up, homie.
toasted. rolled. oats.
make it happen.
your whole F*ing head will exxxplode (figuratively)
and your mind will exxxpand exxxponentially at the much-improved flavor
of those already expert groats.
i'm serious as heck right now.
i had toasty oats, AND toasty coconut,
AND chocolate, too!
when it's time to rock the funky joinx, i'm on poinx....
ummm, wait. that's not it.
i made some burly bars for breakfast, and they were the HOTTNESS.
(that exxxtra T is for exxxtra hottness)
check the teleport:

this was a new experience for me, man.
the toasty bits, the soft batter,
the whole thing-
not my usual move, but still a welcome addition to the grimoire of goodies
i've been compiling.
you wanna know what i had happening over here?
you got it.
it goes a little something like this:
preheat the oven to 350℉
grease a brownie pan 9 x 12 or whatever it is.
in your reliable stand mixer, cream up:
1/2 cup sugar;
1/2 tsp salt;
2 tsp vanilla;
1 stick (8 T) vegan butter substitute;
2/3 cup non-dairy yogurt.
-get that uniformly combined,
and add in:
1 cup non-dairy s'milk-
carton-style drinking coconut would be nice, but any is cool.
whisk it up into a smooth lil blendy batch of wetness, and get read to rock your socks.
in a medium pan, on medium heat, toast up:
1 cup oatmeal;
1 cup unsweetened shredded coconut.
add that, and 1 1/2 cups flour,
plus 1 tsp each baking powpow and soda,
to the mixer,
and get yourself a nice wet batter for spooning and spreading into that pan.
bake it for 30 minutes,
and flip it out onto a rack to cool.
make yourself another 'nother other half batch of oats and coconut for the top,
it'll smell so good you'll wonder what the F* you've been doing all this time.
i'm sayin', the toast factor is TIGHT and TILTY and DOOOOOOOOOPE.
do it, you'll see.
i hooked up some of that coconut chocolate, too-
2 T raw coconut oil;
3 T sifted cocoa;
1/2 tsp vanilla;
2 T s'milk;
3 T powdered sugar.
melted up, and spread out, and activated with those toasty sprankles!
there's a LOT of oats and coconut in these,
too much is the right amount, man.
get with it, or get lost.
they're moist. they're knobbly. they're hearty. they're sweet.
and the best part?
they are proportionately healthy-ish,
so you can eat MORE before you're a gross piece of sh!t for doing so.
that's what i'm talkin' about, b!
i was a tattooing fool yesterday!
some of you may know already that i work seven days a week.
some of you just found out.
but it's true, i do, and i feel like that's the best option for me.
i mean, really-
i have my own still-new business, in a place with several other similar businesses;
admittedly, my very own hotspot for new hottness,
with MORE dedication, MORE discretion, MORE personal style,
MORE personality, MORE accessibility, MORE hands-on experience,
MORE versatility, MORE availability, and MORE of everything else-
but still,
i want success for myself and my friends,
and that includes all the comforts and material bric-a-brac that we can stack,
whenever we want, wherever we are, gucci gucci gucci all the time in your face, etc.
and in order to DO that, and have that, and provide that?
y'boi needs to WORK.
tattooing is also my sole social outlet.
no, actually-
i don't count walking crabtree around the woodsly goodness
and bumping into the occasional outdoor pedestrian as being social.
and what's more,
i don't want to go out to a bar and see people at their happy worst-
i'm not a huge fan of going out to eat.
nah. not when i'm over here making mountains of mealtime virtuosity.
and on the ones,
i certainly don't want to try to listen to music over the voices and bodies
of undulating stinking inebriates, either-
i'm not that guy.
if that works for you, that's cool.
i'm jealous, because you must already be as accomplished as you'd like to be;
i'm sayin'.
to afford the time to pursue other interests with no tangible results
is a luxury that still eludes me.
i'm on that UP-time jauns.
real talk-
there's no down time.
i've got work to do, duders.
and my work is personal, i'm a working person, i put in work, i work with purpose...
all by myself,
well, with a couple of seriously committed clients in the spot,
i got busy than a muh'fug yesterday,
and did a solid square foot of thigh tattoo,
followed by a fat jobstoppin'  hand zapper.
and that was after crushing six smaller tattoos on five people the day before.
i'm at my happiest when i'm pursuing a purpose,
and if it happens to provide a movie check or two?
i promise to spend it on something that's going to improve my circumstances.
the studio and the kitchen.
those are my spots.
creating is not necessarily a choice, but a compulsion,
and i may never know WHY i feel like i have to make something every day,
but i'll take some small reassurance that persistence and ambition propel
me into the future, and compel me to pursue a stronger, more competent,
more efficient, effective, excellent, empathetic, expert version of myself.
why would i be content with anything less?
i'm only human, but that's sort of the point.
more than any other living thing we get a choice of how to proceed.
i know what i'm opting for;
never quiet, never soft.....

No comments: