GRANDE!!!!

the big B strikes again!!!
dudes,
the first of the month demanded a tribute.
yup.
a massive attack on titanic treats, with real maple syrup,
and allllllll the crispy homeboyfries.
every single one of 'em.
that's what's up.
mmhmm.
on the ones,
y'gotta pre-roast your pan-fried potatoes.
otherwise, all that crunch-edged expertism is going to elude you,
and you'll get mushblops instead.
we wouldn't that now, would we?...let's be real here.
the skin-on cubes of starchy love form up above need to be crisssssp,
or instead of being straight-up fire, they're fired.
guys,
the first day is always a big deal.
it's the first impression that usually determines the direction we're headed.
(not in my case, really....nearly everybody who meets me isn't feelin' it at first)
so,
to show up and march into march with a Positive Mental Attitude
and dedicated determination to just be dope,
all damned day, and week, and month-long;
i know i'm gonna definitely need a whole lotta nutrients inside my body
to fuel the blastoff into the burliest of big activation.
y'know?
and THAT's why the big B is so important.
check the teleport:

waffles.
waffles.
WAFFLES.
WAFFLES!
i do love a good waffle,
and i do enjoy my waffle iron's dedicated service to in-charge largeness in the morning.
these jauns were custom as always;
a from-scratch blend of flours and flavors designed to delight and excite and ignite
the tilty, tight, and bright spots of march the first.
....it worked.
box mix is for jerks.
that's no joke.
i do it the old ways for the new days of future past.
here's the recipe:
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WINNING WAFFLES!
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in a metal mixin' bowl, whisk together:
1 cup flour;
1/2 tsp salt;
1/2 cup fresh coarse ground oat flour;
4 T ground unsweetened coconut;
3 T sugar;
1 1/2 tsp baking powder;
1 tsp baking soda;
4 T freeze-dried raspberry bits and pieces.
add in:
1 1/4 cups non-dairy milk;
2 tsp vanilla;
3-4 T melted non-dairy butter;
3 T vegan sour cream.
whisk it up,
and let it rest in the fridge for at least an hour.
modern waffle irons have a readiness light and temperature controls.
i'm willing to bet you can figure it all out from here.
i'd set your oven to 200℉, with a heat-resistant plate,
to keep all the waffles warm and ready until they're all ironed out.
i use a pretty big spoon, because i like pretty big waffles,
but you can do whatever you'd like, because i'm not going to be joining you.
so, go crazy and make small lazy ones if you'd like.
i covered mine in real new hampshire maple syrup,
because rules is rules,
and i am not an A*-hole when it comes to brekkie.
uh-uh.
and then, i hit it with a deliciously decadent mixed berry compote.
yeah!!!
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MIXXXXY BERRYJAMBOREE!
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in a small saucepot, over medium-low heat,
defrost:
1/2 cup each: strawberries, raspberries, blueberries;
add 1/4 tsp lemon extract;
1/2 tsp vanilla;
1 T lemon juice;
1 T powdered sugar.
let iit melt down, then add:
1 T organic non-GMO cornstarch, slurried in the berry runoff.
it'll thicken quickly, and you'll get psyched even faster,
so be ready, and get some MORE powpowdered sugar to sprankle on top.
thick, crisp-edged, juicy, berry, tart, tangy, sweet, hearty, oaty hottness
all set into one spot as a masterpiece of concentrated sustenance and sexxxiness?
indeed.
but that's not enough.
not hardly.
too much is the right amount.
and towards that goal,
there's ranchero tofu to get crackin' on.
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RANCHERO SCRAMBLERS!
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guys, y'gotta get all the veggies ready first-
1/2 cup chopped sweet rainbow red, orange and yellow bell baby peppers,
1/4 cup diced poblano;
1/4 cup diced cubanelle;
2 T minced jalapeno;
1/2 sweet onion, chopped;
2 large cloves sliced garlic;
1/2 cup halved baby sweet grape tomatoes;
3/4 tsp ground coriander seed
1/2 tsp cumin;
1/2 tsp GPOP;
olive oil for sauteing.
get those veggies ready, and get 'em soft in a hot skillet,
and when the onions turn translucent, zip it up with a tablespoon of cider vinegar.
then you can remove that for a little minute,
while you activate the 'fu.
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1 block exxxtra-firm tofu, pressed, dried, and crOmbled;
black salt;
a punch of nootch;
a huge shake up of turmeric;
smoked paprika to taste;
GPOP, exxxtra heavily dispensed;
33 craxxx of black pepper;
and some oil for sizzlin'.
when you've got a masterful yellow scrambo heap, add the veg back in,.
and stir in two huge handfuls of baby kale or spinach or whatever dark green leaves you like,
and remove it from the heat-
toss in cilantro, scallions, and sliced jalapeno rings,
and get yourself ready to exxxplode with satisfaction,
because that stuff is expert to eleven and beyond.
word up.
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and when you factor in the homeboyfries?
it's called a flawless victory, my man.
that's what's up.
starting the month on a high note is essential.
it's the taking the first step of a long journey on the right foot.
smart.
nutrients?
we GOT THEY!
beauty?
we GOT THEY!
fullness?
we GOT THEY!
you got they?
WE GOT THEY!
maybe you don't speak in colloquial alb-onics,
but trust y'boi- we GOT THEY!
hahahaha.
that's just for me, i think, but that's cool.
i write what i want, and i write how i talk,
and i talk like i'm pretty flippin' coarse.
i believe it's plain truth,
with some purple adjectives and invectives and expletives for good measure.
it's an intimate ongoing interactive conversation with my surroundings,
and it's all really happening,
as language transforms, so do we.
i'm writing an evolutionary memoir of my life.
it's mostly food,
a little love,
a lot of canine companionship,
and very little career.
yet, i work more than i do anything else.
is that duplicitous,
or conscientious curating of a legacy?
maybe it's too soon to tell.
maybe it's a great idea.
maybe that's what you get;
never quiet, never soft.....