Thursday, March 1

RABBIT!!! RABBBIITTTT!!!

yoooooooooo!!!!!
today is the day.
yup.
the big new-new.
the new big-big.
that gooooodsly woodsly warrior-poetic lion entrance.
that's IT.
dudes,
marchentine madness is now officially back on the map.
the calendar is flipped,
the day is underway,
the pancake batter is in the fridge,
and there's strawberries on the stovetop gettin' thiccc.
this is how it starts, and the azimuth is gonna be a real bastard to calculate,
because the heavens are swirling overhead in a spiral
of ultrasupermagnetic auger-style augury,
boring into our brains with full-moon lunatic intensity.
i can F*ing feel it,
thumping like a bass-boosted bellows, blasting blood like tidal waves
from the furious furnace and the battle-beastly boiler
all the way out to the trembling tips of my talons.
damn, that's some burly bardly shameless shamanic druid celestial attunement sh!t.
ooooof.
eleven years are no joke,
and while all of that free-flowing free-falling freeballin' firmament fury
is rotating like a maelstrom overhead?
y'boi still made sure to speak the spell,
and pronounce the sentence that summons up some cultivated coincidences
and fortuitous circumstances from out of thin air.
mmmhmmm.
what do you think i am?
some kind of an A*-hole?
no way-
rules is rules, fools.
and on the first day,
the first thing we say has always GOT to be the magic word. ...twice.
c'mon.
you already know, bro.
and i said it out loud, fresh, and hard, right out of the box:
rabbit! rabbit!
that's all there is to it.
i said it, i meant it, it happened, and now here we are-
in march.
in the morning.
making breakfast.
and being expert.
obvi.
*
how did my last day in february go?
maaaaaan, it was pretty tight.
cool tattoos on cool folks,
good times with better folks,
full moons with full hearts,
and chocolate raspberry treats in all their ultimate glory.
that's real.
check me if you don't believe:

WU-TANG!!!
chocolate and raspberry is my most favoritest combination these days.
i just want more and MORE of it,
so i keep right on makin' and bakin' it.
that's a great big yum, neighbors.
for realsies.
you need to have something like this in your life.
that's the truth.
here's what you're gonna need to do to make sure that you get the boomsplosions
of berry chocolate beautification ready for your hungry head:
-
*
CHOCOBERRASPY BROWN-EYES!!
-
preheat your oven to 350℉, convection style, because that's luxurious.
-
in your NEW stand mixer (or maybe that's just me)
whisk up:
1 stick (8T) vegan earth balance buttery delight;
1 cup light brown sugar;
2/3 cup non-dairy vanilla yogurt;
1/2 tsp salt;
2 tsp vanilla;
2/3 cup cocoa.
get that all blended,
and whip in:
1 cup non-dairy milk;
1 tsp lemon juice.
(i also added 1/4 cup chocolate frosting just because i had it, it isn't necessary)
-
whip that into one very wet muddy mush,
and sift in:
2 1/2 cups flour;
2 tsp bakey powder;
1 tsp baking soda.
give it all a good high speed whippin' and whoopin',
and pour it and spread it evenly into a brownie pan,
where y'gotta bake it for 33 minutes.
now,
if you don't let this jaun cool, it'll crack apart when you flip it out of the pan...
so, be patient.
and when it's room temperature,
melt you up some of that raspberry ganache, b.
mmmhmmm.
1/2 cup dark chocolate chips,
a few tablespoons of non-dairy milk,
a splash of vanilla,
a tablespoon of powdered dried raspberries,
and another tablespoon of crushed berries,
plus a few tablespoons of powdered sugar,
melted just enough to get spreadable.
mmmm. mmmmm. mmmmmmmmm.
you will be freakin' out over the next-level tightness of the thing, kid.
-then y'freak it off with dried crOmbles and sprankles.
i mean,
too much IS the right amount.
...so don't go gettin' cheap with the add-ons.
that's not enough sweet pink magenta boomfire tho is it?
no way.
that's where that thiqqqq white chocolate raspberry biz comes into play-
it's melty chips and berries, powdered sugar and s'milk,
heated, melted, and drizz'd all over everything else....
that's some expert excellence for all y'all faces, friends.
ultimate sensory shark-gluttonous happiness is HERE.
*
it's MARCH.
heck, it's practically PARADE...
oh, c'mon.
you get it.
except, i cannot abide parades.
they're the worst.
just standing around watching people pass by at an excruciating pace is not for me.
but, march is pretty rad.
up here in the woodsly goodness, it doesn't get blistery and blustery until april,
so we're soaking in extended sunshine,
and for the time being, warmishness.
there's plenty of mud and melted snow trying to mush us up and cool us off,
but the skies are alive with the smell of marching, guys.
it's the calens, and we've no need to beware until the ides,
so for now,
let's all enjoy the time we have been given,
and make moves on more majestic magic for the whole entire month;
never quiet, never soft.....

No comments: