Friday, May 20

coconut forever.

some folks don't get down with coconut,
and that's too bad.
i mean,
it's delicious, nutritious, propitious, auspicious, and prodigious.
i happen to love the stuff,
but that could be because i don't get down with the suckiness.
nope.
sulphured chewy sweetened easter grass-style poor person coconut is a big yuck.
those limp plastic bags of peat mossy superwhite gummy unbearableness aren't for me.
i like the real stuff.
always.
real recognize real,
and i like to get it poppin' in my Folk Life & Liberty Fortress test kitchen.
i do.
and yet again, when it was bakery-makery time in the woodsly goodness,
i brought the fire to the Fortress,
and it came out expert;
check the coconut-x-6-type teleport:

coffee cake is good because it's kind of messy.
the crumbles of the crumb are what make it so much fun to eat,
i'm on that bumpy, lumpy, knobbly jauns,
and i really took the mantra to heart-
too much is the right amount.
no, really-
coconut flour, coconut oil, coconut flakes, coconut milk, coconut sugar,
and coconut yogurt!!!!
damn.
that's sure a whole lotta coconuttiness,
but,
rules is rules, and that's no joke.
you might want to make it.
here's how:
-
half a cup of sugar, half a cup of coconut sugar,
half a stick of butterish, four tablespoons of coconut oil,
creamed, with six ounces of vanilla coconut yogurt,
and a teaspoon and a half of vanilla....
a cup of flour, a half a cup of flour, a cup of coconut flour,
a cup of coconut milk, a teaspoon of baking kapowder.
and a teaspoon of baking soda,
and a half a cup of ground coconut flakes,
all in one place,
turned out into a greased 9"springform,
and baked for 45 minutes at 350F, give or take.
-
neighbors,
coffee cake, though!
ha.
the texture is on point,
the dryness is just not there-
all that dense coconut milkiness holds ambient moisture like a chamois,
and it's SO decadent for all that heavy-duty coconut hottness within.
that's why i HAD to activate it just a little bit more.
uh-huh.
if i'm going all-out, i've got to put it all in.
it's covered in whipped buttery coconut frosting, just to keep with the theme.
and then,
it still goes up one notch, to eleven,
with those coconut flake sprankles.
yuuuuuuuuuup.
an overdose of stacks on stacks on stacks,
impossibly packed into a single-decker disc.
i doo-doo that freaky sh!t,
and then i eat the heck out of it, too.
*
i sure do like baking treats.
in a lot of ways, it's the most rewarding thing about my week.
however,
i DO think that food photography
has become the only way to remind myself of my progression in
the realm of food-head forcefulness.
y'know?
i mean,
i believe all true and good chefs and cooks are artists,
but,
damn me for a fool if i don't see the fundamental flaw in the product-
it's so transitive, so a-la-prima,
that posterity isn't a part of the equation.
beauty fades, but food digests,
and transforms a whole lot faster from the hottness to the not-so-much.
thank goodness for pictures.
they're worth a thousand words, but not even one tastebud.
that's tough.
i can prove i made a pretty thing;
although you'll just have to take my word for it that it tastes great, too.
art repeats itself, and art destroys itself,
but food nourishes an' that-
it's a fair trade, in the end.
i do both, because that's the only way to go.
burning the candle at both ends,
and keeping both ends, as well as all extremities occupied.
that's the way of the warrior poet.
talking sh!t and eating beauty;
mack-handing the magic and ham-fisting the future;
taking sh!ts and pulling tricks out of my A*;
it's all really happening,
and that's the whole point;
never quiet, never soft.....

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