Wednesday, February 21

COOKIEBERRIES!

cookie pie.
because cookies aren't always gonna be sexxxy enough on their own,
sometimes y'gotta make 'em much much bigger to be much much better.
that's real.
and cookie pie is a fan favorite around these parts, anyway,
so it's an easy win to make just one reallllllly large and in charge jaun,
and cut everybody a slice off that superior circle.
mmhmmm.
my favorite combo lately has been raspberries and chocolate.
i decided to keep that pairing going strong,
and put a whole mess of both in my most recent baked greatness.
guys,
it's pretty flippin' expert.
take a look for yourself:

COOKIE PIE!
that's a cutie, isn't it?
i know!
there's dried raspberries all over the place,
and they really turn the chocolate up to eleven, man.
i'm guessing it's the tartness of the fruit that activates the smooth richness
in those dark droplets of delight.
i don't know for certain why it works so well,
i'm just certain that it does.
there's nothing to it but to do it, and when it comes to doo-dooin' that kind of
burly, bigger-than-average, barbarian baked beauty,
i'm y'boi!
two kinds of frosting? of course.
too much is the right amount!
plus,
there are exxxtra chips and crushed berry sprankles on top too.
that's how it's done when it's done like a F*ing expert, kids.
believe it.
here's what i did; just in case you're ready to get into some of this grown-A* serious stuff.
-
*
RASPBERRY CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE GIGANTE!
-
preheat your oven to 375℉.
-
line a 9" cast iron pan with parchment paper.
-
in a medium mixing bowl, cream up the standard base:
1 stick (8T) vegan butterish;
1/2 tsp salt;
1 cup light brown sugar;
1 tsp vanilla;
-
stir in 1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce;
mix well, then add:
2 large handfuls (approx 1/2 cup?) crushed freeze-dried raspberries;
2 large handfuls mini dark chocolate chips;
2 1/4 cups flour;
1 tsp ea. baking powder and soda.
stir, then knead all that into a wet dough,
and press it into the lined pan.
i always leave a rim a little higher before baking-
it melds together without doming when you do that.
press a few MORE chips onto the top.
heck, press a bunch MORE on there.
chocolate is good for you, dude.
-
bake it for 25ish minutes,
or until the top looks goldenized a little tiny baby bit.
let it cool, or the next step will be a real bummer.
-
*
FROSTING a & b!!
-
in your trusty brand new cherry red valentine stand mixer, (oh, wait, that's just me)
combine:
1 stick softened vegan butter or 8 T tub butts;
3 cups powdered sugar;
1 tsp vanilla;
1/3 cup non-dairy milk.
^^^^
that's whipped into the best frosting.
but if you add a teaspoon or two of powdered freeze dried berries into it?
you get the even betterest frosting, neighbors!
that's right.
vanilla and raspberry creamy dreams,
and then the exxxtra dusty spranks over that!
-
that's how you make the magic without even conjuring up a sweat.
real talk,
the thick, soft, rich, sweet crumble of this bad baby,
and the smooth, tart, fluffy forsting,
and the sharp berry zap of the crushed toppin' jauns are all working in unison to
really take the experience off the charts into some stratospheric orbital awesome times.
that's a thing.
***********
cookies are great,
but whole days of drawn-on tattoos are even better.
yup.
AMPERSAND TATTOO is ready to make you unique in ways you previously were not.
ha!
seriously though-
i've had stacks on stacks of dudes,
but they best ones are getting custom one-off one-shot hot spots,
courtesy of me and my marky markers.
the weirdest part?
they're not even the tax return clients, yet.
i know! that's crazy.
these guys are spending their own regularly-hard-earned movie checks
on some one-of-a-kind marky makey artsy zipzaps.
i love it,
and i'm savoring every second before the rank-and-file doo-doo butter returns.
i'm not too good to do anything.
that's gross.
but,
i also don't necessarily like everything that comes through the door, either.
sure, there's compensation for all of it.
does that mean i can't have preferences?
of course not.
and while the internet has provided thousands of local ladies with their own unique tattoo
ideas, that just happen to be identical in every way to each other,
some of the more creative types are getting the bigger and better ones,
and we're co-creating them as a tandem tag-team of artistic expressionists.
that's a lot more rewarding for all of us.
we've still got plenty of banal, budget, bummers in stock, though,
so don't feel like we can accommodate you if you're lame.
in fact,
we'd love to see you, so stop on in and get some fresh, hot, tasty tattz if you're up for it;
never quiet, never soft..... 

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