Thursday, February 14


it's valentine's day.
that means treats.
cookies are great, and great cookies are even greater.
i make some pretty frickin' alright treats, and i'm looking to share.
that's what valentine's is about, right?
i mean, when you're little anyway, y'know?
everybody gets a little somethin'.
rules is rules.
i made a LOT of cookies for the big day.
here's the first batch:

sugar cookies, bro.
that's what you want.
that's what i got.
and they're crisp-edged and soft-centered and powdery sugared sprankles.
plus, those little dollopy blops of icy sugary pink dots!
i love the notion of love,
i love the idea of romance,
and i am the biggest fan of the heart shape.
we all know what it means, and we all use it to express a whole range of positivity.
man, i'm with that.
you want a recipe?
i got a recipe.
here it is:
preheat your oven to 350℉
in a medium mixing bowl, combine:
12 T of vegan butter;
1 cup sugar;
2 tsp vanilla;
1/2 tsp salt.
add in:
2 fat cups of flour;
1 tsp baking soda...
stir it all up, and start kneading-
add 4+ T non-dairy milk, and 1 T agave,
and make sure it's all doughy and soft and pliable-
wrap it up in plastic, and keep it in the fridge for half an hour-
roll it out, cut some shapes, and arrange 'em on a tray or two.
y'gotta freeze 'em for eight-ten minutes,
so they stay nice when you bake 'em for eight-ten minutes-
they're good, guys.
and you can decorate 'em however you want, of course-
i went for uniformity and relative simplicity, and i'm a fan.

i have a second round ready, and THOSE go to eleven.
but, you'll have to wait for tomorrow to see that.
in the meantime,
get some hearts,
give some hugs,
get a few kisses,
call your exes,
maybe have an O first to clear you head first, to prevent dialing,
and generally be nice.
it's romantic today.
or, it's not.
or, it might be.
i dunno.
i DO know that i've got chocolates and cards and flowers and all of that.
i said it already: rules is rules.
i do the things, even when they don't do a thing.
i wouldn't know what else to do anyway;
never quiet, never soft.....

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