Tuesday, February 5


ain't no party like a shark-gluttonous vegan pizza party,
because too much is the right amount,
and MORE pizza means MORE party.
i think that's a thing.
all i know is that sometimes, a faux-focaccia crust is a good thing.
if you add exxxtra yeast, and exxxtra buttery big action
to the dough and salt and water that makes up a pizza's core,
then you get a double-fluffy, crisp-edged circle of success that can't be rivaled.
no joke.
check the teleport:

i've been going wild on the three-chee' scene, na'mean?
daiya mozz', MINCED....rules is rules;
miyoko mozz', grated for greatness.
and homemade stretchy tapioca tofu mozzarella, from scratch.
we got crushed fire roasted tomatoes on there, heavy;
but not overloading the dough so much as to make it wet.
then spinach leaves.
leafy greens are what you need, nerds.
that's for sure.
then the the two loose chee' jauns, and caramelized onions.
by now, you should know a couple of things:
carmies have ALL  the flavor and should be included whenever possible.
and also, the rules for Folk Life & Liberty Fortress pizza time state clearly
that fried garlic sprankles are a must, or else you're doing it wrong,.
word up.
so we got all that-
and braised broccoli, too.
i gotta tell you-
those black olives are effing amazing.
zero tinny terribleness, and all the big salty sexxxiness you'd expect from
a sensational set of solid circular darkness.
and when you blop that tapioca mozzarella on top?
it goes to eleven, kiddo.
that's for realsies.
finished off with radicchio ribbons when it came out,
and ready to satiate my feeding-frenzied furious hunger.
THAT'S how you do pizza when you care about correctly doing pizza.
the dough, though.
that was the hero of the day.
2 1/4 cups of flour;
2 tsp salt;
1 pkg fast-actin' yeast;
2 tsp breadmachine yeast;
3 T vegan butter;
1 T olive oil;
3/4 cup very warm water.
kneaded in a stand mixer with a dough hook for 11 minutes if you're an expert,
or by hand, forever and ever, if you're not.
i'm a slow cold proof guy.
i make the dough, i give it a few, then i cover and refrigerate it all day while i'm at work,
and stretch it out a few minutes before the oven is preheated to 480℉.
that's just how i do it here at home.
when we build a big brick coal oven, it'll be a whole new world.
until then,
i'm a cold and slow sort of fella.
that's my move.
i LOVE pizza.
i LOVE lunar new year.
i LOVE pigs, alive, and not chopped up.
i LOVE wood. morning noon afternoon,evening and night.
i'm a 24 hour woodsman, y'feel me?
i don't even know what i mean by that.
i'm excited for today,
and i'm excited for the week.
90% of what happens is colored by our attitude about it,
so, my attitude is one of gratitude and generosity.
i'm gonna make tattooing fun again in 2019,
and i'm gonna have big love with a huge family forever afterwards,
and i'm gonna eat dumplings for breakfast.
i dare you to tell me i won't.
that's what i thought;
never quiet, never soft.....

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