Friday, February 1


F* the cold, eat more pizza.
those are wise words, and i feel them deeply in my heart.
i LOVE pizza, and it always imparts the warmth of a loving heart inside me.
especially when it's homemade, man.
homemade tastes better, and that's for really real.
how did i say bye bye to january?
with way too much food.
first i gorged myself on blueberry muffins,
and that was after a big ol' powerful morning smoothie,
and the i came home, fired up the oven to 480 luscious fahrenheit convection degrees,
and took my made-earlier dough out of the fridge for a lil bit more rising,
and got way expert on an ultimo-overloaded circle of pure hottness for my face!
pizza is my most comforting food, dudes.
and when i'm feeling all the feels?
i need a LOT of pizza, obvi.
y'wanna see how i soothe my sad and savage sentiments?
check the teleport:

my favorite, with a twist.
brussels, tempeh bacon, and onion,
with potatoes, parsley, cooked sauce, minced daiya mozz',
grated great miyoko mozz,
and fried garlic sprankles for the win. bro.
too much is the right amount,
and that's an overload of awesome in one place.
the brussels sprouts are quartered, sauteed in olive oil,
zapped with a splash of hot water,
steamed a bit, and finished with tamari...
that's tight.
the potatoes are sliced thin, oiled, salted, and peppered.
then roasted on parchment while the oven preheated...
a crispy potato is a genius move on a pizza.
that's a fact, and you gotta try it.
caramelized red onions? yup.
onions are a must.
if you don't love onions, you're weird, and wrong.
slow cooked carmies have alll the sweetness, and all the flavor!
and that's what you need, nerds.
minced daiya mozz'? tight.
grated miyoko mozz'? also necessary.
a double chee' situation is verrrry expert.
and the daiya needs to be minced, or it's bullsh!t.
tempeh bacon is DOPE.
i got the recipe and it gets me going.
that's a half cup of warm water;
2 T tamari;
2 T agave;
GPOP, smoked paprika, hot paprika, black pepper;
and 11 slabs of 1/4" sliced tempeh,
simmered in there until it's all absorbed.
fresh parsley gives it a bright sensation.
fried garlic sprankles are mandatory.
rules is rules.
i don't want bummery pizza, ever.
so, i make exxxtra-sexxxy pizza, always.
there's no way i'm gonna create despair for dinner.
i mean, i get what i get, and i don't get upset,
mostly because i need to make the hottness for myself, exclusively.
and i do.
the dough?
simple af.
but also, all the way off-the-charts delicious-
in my stand-upright man-mixer, with the dough hook arm-wrestling everything,
i had:
1 cup flour;
1 cup semolina flour;
2 tsp salt;
3/4 cup + 2 T warm water;
1 pkg yeast;
1 tsp bread machine yeast.
all kneaded up for 11 minutes,
covered, and refrigerated all dang day long.
then, it got stretched on my well-seasoned oiled, steel baking tray,
and baked until almost done,
then transferred directly to the stones as a finishing move.
it matters, and it makes a difference
and you can clearly taste how much more elite the pizza is.
i love it.
i needed it. and i'm happy about it.
also, for the record, the sauce was what was left from my pasta the other night.
it was SO much better a few days later, and it was realllllly good when it was first made,
so just imagine the upgrade i experienced on my pizza pie.
yesterday was sort of my other birthday.
or at least, it was the anniversary of becoming somebody better.
yesterday marked five years of getting divorced.
...for the second time.
maybe that doesn't even matter.
i have a record-keeper in my brain,
and it keeps count of days and weeks and months and years;
that internal calendar marks the passage of time and the progress form a to b
in save-point milestones and high-and-low watermarks.
it's true.
in a lot of ways, it was a big beginning more than any kind of ending.
i know, i know- that's some sappy-style hippie sh!t, but it's true.
half a relationship is enough to eff up  a whole life,
but starying fresh with a clean slate is the path to self improvement.
i had an ineffective relationship based on common ethical and situational similarities,
but with somebody who never really ever loved me.
that led to resentment on both sides, and that created adversarial antagonism that eventually
overwhelmed us.
that's the super-short version, but it works.
and since then,
i've had nothing but time to think about how i want to be, where i want to be,
and who i think i am......
that's heavy.
but, half a decade later, i don't really know a damned thing.
and i s'pose that's more true than if i claimed to have anything all figured out.
i want conversations that go somewhere.
i want all the homemade radical vegan good food.
i want big love.
i want to work hard, and do good work.
that's a simple list of demands, right?
it sounds easy, but it takes up all my time.
it's all really happening, always, and there's a perpetual state of becoming
that dominates the landscape of my mind.
the best version of myself is slowly but surely being refined every day,
and i'm going in the direction that my choices takes me-
echoing outward, moving forward, doing my best.
that's all that i can do,
so that's all i do;
never quiet, never soft.....

No comments: